How to tell if he no longer loves you

Kemi Lawal - Nigeria

Does your guy love you? This will save you from weeks or even months of wondering and second guessing everything he says and does. If you ask him this question and he says yes, that may not do the trick. If you want to know where his heart is, there are some signs he is ready to stay committed and indeed loves you as much as you love him.

This starts with evaluating how much time he wants to spend with you as opposed to how much time the two of you are actually spending together. The difference is very telling. Think about how often he is the one suggesting you hang out. Does he call you quite a bit just to talk? Does he make plans for the two of you to go out and do things together or is that typically your responsibility? If a man is getting serious about a woman, he wants to spend as much of his time as he can with her. He doesn't care if they are out enjoying a fine dinner or if they are at home watching television. The important thing to him is that he's with her. If your man is constantly telling you that he can't see you because of work or other engagements, he may still be stuck in like mode, not love mode.

You can also tell how serious a guy is about you based on how well you know the other important people in his life. Many women don't realise this as a great gauge for judging a man's feelings. If he's already introduced you to his family and close friends, take that as a very good sign. On the other hand, if he shies away from bringing you to any family gatherings or if you have never met the friends he spends a lot of time with, that's not good at all. When a man is in love and thinking commitment with a woman, he wants everyone he loves to know her.

He can't wait to tell you what happened in the day. Every night he updates you with how he spent his day, without you asking first. He finds it a joy sharing these intimate details with you. When he hears a new joke, he can't wait to call you immediately and make you laugh.

He is willing to share details of his finances with you. The topic of finances can be quite sensitive and is usually not something that is openly shared, even with friends. If he is willing to tell you, he probably treats you more than a casual friend!

He rushes to your side upon hearing that you are sick. Even if it is really late at night and he has an important meeting the next morning, he is willing to come and bring you to the doctor. Only a guy who is serious about you will be that worried!

He does not show signs that he is terrified when you mention something happening in a year or two. It shows that he is serious about the relationship he has with you. He can see himself being with you even two years later.

He seeks your opinion in everything from minor decisions to major ones.

It could be something as simple as buying a tie to match his shirt. Or major ones like what car he should buy. It shows that he values your opinions and thinks that you have great judgment and insight as well.

If you are in a relationship and at the minimum 20 per cent of all these is absent, then no one needs to tell you that he has no plans for you. He just does not love you enough or does not love you at all. He is probably dilly dallying with you until his Mrs. Right comes along.