Written by Candida - Vanguard, Nigeria.
In the battle of the sexes one advantage women will always have over the men is their boobs! Simple as it is. it is very comical how seemingly intelligent men turn into whimpering teenage boys at the sight of a well-stacked women. I thought I'd heard and seen everything for and against the mammary gland until recently when I was in the midst of 'matured' men who amused themselves by analysing the aqnatomy of fremale gtuests at a wedding.
"What's so special about a pair of boobs?"I asked Supo, one of these men. He had bragged he was strictly a boobs man. Actually, most men do.I agreed with him, swearing that a woman without `more bounce to the once', has virtually lost her femininity! "Are you serious?" he wanted to know. "Do you know of any other aphrodisiac that's been around since God created man that generates as much excitement as a pair of boobs? It is not as if they've suddenly arrived out of nowhere you know? All warm. All soft. And pleasing to touch! New toys for the beautiful generations to play with! To make it more interesting, you get them in various
shapes and sizes.
"My fIrst fascination with boobs started in my second year in secondary school. I was only 14 then and our housemaid allowed me to do it to her. She must have noticed me lusting after her and decided to take me out of my misery! There I was. a pubescent boy confronted with a pair of knockers. She was huge. Just huge! I had never seen a pair of boobs like hers in all my life. And I'd seen my mother's and my elder sister's. Her own (the maid's) just bulged from everywhere. Over. Under, Between. Great trembling folds of flesh like a set jelly that you shake around. Terrific! You could put your head between them and blot out the world!
"She never bothered to keep them under wraps either. always throwing open her wrapper to re-tie! She taught me how to hold them. Kiss them. the biggest ice cream ever invented! It was years later that I wondered where she learnt the tricks from – my dad or my brother? Like I said. the housemaid made sure that I enjoyed the wonder of her boobs. She wriggled as I eagerly followed her lead. The heat of the excitement I felt sent a shock right through my school-boy's body. I was a man. I had made it! Her buba opened and wrapper tossed aside with careless abandon. I held my first whole woman cushion against my chest and I was drunk with lust.
"And I think I hung on to her breasts all the way through my bumbling sex act. Hung on like my whole life depended on it. Eyes screwed tight and shut in ecstatic wonder, I had absolutely no technique. But we got by. From that day on. I was hooked. I stole food and money for her and gladly helped with some of her chores – and she was generously grateful! Muti (that's the maid's name), wherever you are today. I thank you for my first launch through space. Since her. and that was a couple of decades back. I'd been hooked on boobs. If you haven't got them. forget it. Having no boobs is like having a bottle of wine without a cork-screw – how do you get to enjoy the wine?"
In case you men out there have conveniently forgotten. boobs are not really for your benefits, you know? Actually, they are to nourish your offsprings into responsible adults.' Instead of latching on to your partner's boobs all of the time, consider the poor mite
for whose sole purpose the boobs are intended.
"I'm a boobs man" Ike, a mechanical engineer bragged. 'and when my wife had our first son, I became jealous of him. Her boobs were fun and oozing milk and he was attached to her chest, sucking away with careless abandon. Could breast milk be tastier than the milk we all knew? Why was the baby in such rapture – over his milk? I was itching to find out. That night. I crawled up to my wife in bed. sort out her boobs and tried sucking them as our son did, hoping to get as much pleasure as he did from her milk. "Yuck!,
the milk tasted very unpalatable and I almost spit it out. What could anyone find enjoyable in that?" I gently reminded him that boobs are to provide infants with nourishment, not give grown-up kids the time of their life!