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Toxic effect of pornography on relationships

Written by Bunmi Sofola
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, June 17, 2018.

In my early teens, I vividly remember sneaking into our father's bedroom from time to time, my heart always in my throat for fear of being caught. I was drawn to a stack of Playboy magazines my dad had surreptitiously hidden amongst flies he always brought from the office," said Ephraim. He's now 28, has a fantastic job and a string of girlfriends-but is not thinking of marriage yet. He is now a member of millions of online pornographic junkies. "As I salivated over the 'full frontal' centrefold, with those glamorous models spread-eagled across pages with come-to-bed eyes and staples through their midriffs-I rushed to my room and masturbated.
"Only, as I grow older, my experience of porn has been very different from my dad's. I'm part of the new generation of men to grow up with internet pornography as part and parcel of everyday life. I've never had to pay for it nor faced the embarrassment of asking for it. When I get tired of one image, there's always another… and another… and another. All I need do is type the words: 'free porn' into an internet search engine and there'd be thousands of hits, with most sites containing hundreds of pornographic images.

"Internet porn was part of my life throughout my early 20s and now at 28; I'm increasingly aware that I have a problem. I'm not yet ready to admit I'm an addict, but there's no denying that internet porn has become a deeply ingrained daily habit. As it is now, I struggle to get through a day without at least one visit to one of my favourite sites.

I'm sure a lot of your readers will be mouthing a silent: 'Yuk' as they read this and I entirely understand their reaction. But what they need to know is that I'm certainly not alone-I'm convinced that virtually every man of my age with access to the internet will log on to internet porn sites on a reasonably regular basis. You see, men, by and large, like porn and enjoy using it-it is getting caught using it that they don't like.

"Today, soft-core porn barely exists. Internet porn is now almost entirely 'hard-core'- which involves female and male models graphically engaged in an extraordinary variety of real sex acts. For years, I thought my internet porn habit was having no effect on my relationships in real life. I was confident I could keep internet sex and real sex separate.

Cardiac disease can kill suddenly during physical exercise -Expert

A consultant physician and cardiologist at the University of Nigeria Teaching Hospital, Enugu, Prof. Benedict Anisiuba, discusses sudden cardiac death with DOLAPO AKITOYE
~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, June 10, 2018.

What is sudden cardiac death?
Sudden cardiac death is a non-traumatic, unexpected fatal event occurring
within one hour of the outset of symptoms in an apparently healthy individual. However, if the death occurs when nobody is present, this definition can also be extended to when the person was in good health 24 hours before being discovered to be dead but if the death is witnessed within one hour of the outset of symptoms, it is sudden cardiac death.


What can cause sudden cardiac death?
It seems that most abnormalities in the body can cause sudden death, whether cardiac or non-cardiac but generally, cardiovascular diseases - diseases of the heart and blood vessels - are more notorious in causing sudden cardiac death but apart from that, diseases of the respiratory system, of the brain and of course, poisoning can also be responsible for it. With regards to the cardiovascular system, the most common disease that causes sudden cardiac death is hypertension and its complications. Hypertension is the leading cause of sudden cardiac death. With most people that die from sudden cardiac death, there is evidence of hypertension in about 70 per cent of them.

Hypertension tops the list followed by heart failure and also, thickening of the walls of the heart which is called left ventricular hypertrophy in medicine. This can result from many causes such as hypertension, sub-congenital diseases and myocardial infarction (heart attack). Heart attack means that the blood vessel taking blood to the heart is blocked. It is also one of the important causes of sudden cardiac death. So, part of the heart dies when the blood supply to it is blocked. It is one of the most important causes in the developed world.


It is catching up in our own part of the world but not as much as in the developed world. For the respiratory diseases, the one that comes easily to mind is acute bronchial asthma. Severe bronchial asthma can definitely lead to sudden death including blockage of the blood vessels going to the lungs referred to as pulmonary embolism.
Diseases of the central nervous system, especially the brain, can also lead to sudden cardiac death especially sudden bleeding in the brain due to abnormal blood vessels which can be congenital (before birth) or acquired (developed along the line). The most obvious cause is severe chemical or drug poisoning. If somebody either intentionally or accidentally takes a dangerous chemical, the person will, of course, die suddenly. This is in addition to drug overdose which can be intentional or accidental.

What are the symptoms that can lead to sudden cardiac death?
By definition, the person is not supposed to have any symptom until one hour before the outset of cardiac death but as can be seen from the causes of sudden cardiac death, there is always some subtle abnormality that is present which is ignored by the doctor, individual or society. However, nobody is to blame. Some of these symptoms are common in the environment that they can always take people to the theatre and start exploring the heart or the brain but generally, the symptoms that precede sudden cardiac death include sudden outset of breathlessness. This can occur either from heart failure or from pulmonary embolism. Breathlessness is a very important symptom leading to sudden cardiac death.

Sex toy: A handy helpmate

~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, June 10, 2018.

Sex toys are still largely shrouded in certain social taboos in many cultures, especially in this part of the world. This however, does not come as a surprise since many people still find it difficult to discuss sex and sexuality issues even privately, not to think of expressing their sexuality, preferences and pleasures in the open. However, this has not stopped the growing market and demand for sex toys from fast gaining ground in Nigeria. This is because more people, especially the young are now more educated, thus enlightened and are more open minded and free to embrace their sexuality.
Simply put, sex toys are man-made instruments designed to enhance human sexual experiences. There are various arguments against the use of sex toys, many of them sexist, self centred, myopic and perhaps parochial. Of the most ridiculous, being that once a woman gets used to using a vibrator, she will have no need for the real thing.

I compare this with our God given legs and their natural ability of movement, taking us from one point to another and the manufacture of cars or various types of transportation also designed to take us from one place to another by man. Now, you have the option of walking to your destination, anytime, anywhere and under any circumstance or simply making things easy, comfortable and pleasurable by taking an appropriate and affordable mode of transportation to your destination. While the choice to either walk or go by transportation remains yours, opting for this instrument for movement does not render your legs useless but assisting your body to perform better and reach your desired destination faster. Nor does acquiring a mode of transportation mean that you will have no need for your legs again or that they will lose the ability to walk. A joke I once read on one of the social media platforms comes to mind.


The conversation was supposedly between a Jamaican Taxi driver and a Muslim male passenger. The man on boarding demanded that the music be turned off because he does not listen to it. He went on to explain that it was a religious injunction because in the time of the great prophet Muhammad (pboh) there was no music or radio. The taxi driver turned off the radio then parked the car a few meters after. He then opened the car door and asked the passenger to get down. Puzzled, he asked the driver what happened and why he was being ushered out of the car. The driver then replied him that, "in the time of the prophet, there were no taxis, so come out of my taxi and wait for a camel". The simple truth is that times have changed and are still changing. The goal is to get to your desired destination (sexual fulfilment/satisfaction), how you get there is your business, so long you are not hurting anyone.

While everything has its merits and demerits, the truth is that sex toys make our sexual efforts easier, faster, more pleasurable and colourful, no matter how uncreative an individual can be. There are several ways sex toys can enhance people's sexual lives as individuals and couples, just as there are many sex toys designed for various parts of the body. As a couple, using sex toys together or alone can help you attain a high level of communication, openness, trust and love for your partner.

Side effects of an orgasm

Written by Sylvester Ikhisemojie
~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, June 10, 2018.

Dr Sylvester Ikhisemojie
In several essays in the past, both on this page and by other writers, the unique nature of sexual release has been studied greatly and explained more. The conclusion has been that sex, particularly when it is satisfactory, is said to do many positive things in the body. Importantly, it is said to be responsible for a sensation of love, of satisfaction and release. Some people are able to sleep better while others are known to feel good both within and without. They seem oblivious to certain physical challenges, namely pain and headache, and therefore maintain a certain spring in their step. However, every coin has two sides just like every story; sometimes, there are even more than two sides. What this means here is that there are certain experiences during and after sex that are very different from any of the facts mentioned above and they are not only surprising but are noteworthy.

Some of these changes in the body are now classified as side effects. Some people especially women; say they experience some intense reactions after having an orgasm. These side effects are described as hallucinations in which many of the women captured in relevant data describe a flying experience which they found quite unnerving. Some others describe a sensation of hurtling through space or of passing through walls into endless corridors resembling underground tunnels. In other situations, some women have described a sensation of experiencing intense headache and even dizziness following an orgasm. Turkey is one country in which some of these responses in women have been most widely studied. Sensationally, men also have described headache and dizziness as two of the most unpleasant side effects they suffer from after an orgasm.

Another side effect first described nearly a century ago, in 1928, is known as orgasmolepsy. It is described in a situation in which there is a sudden loss of muscle power, causing such profound weakness that sleep ensues. This is also found in association with certain sleep disorders like narcolepsy, an uncontrollable desire to fall asleep. The symptoms last for about 30 seconds or less during which there is a complete loss of muscle control following an orgasm. It is a state resembling anaesthesia and the persons are completely helpless in that position.

Crying is another unusual side effect of having an orgasm. It is a constellation of effects after sex in which the persons involved could cry or become tearful, sad or display signs of anxiety. The persons may also become agitated and desperate and some researchers have said that the reality of physical separation so soon after a lot of intimacy may be the trigger because the female partner becomes suddenly lonely. In one study, one in three female university students has reported experiencing some of the above features. These feelings can happen as long as one entire hour after having sex and it often occurs even in stable relationships. It is an alarming experience to see a partner who bursts into tears after intercourse and it is initially difficult to relate it to a side effect as such. This is because there is another group of women who might burst into tears as a result of rape or because they immediately get to regret their sexual experience right after the act. In the former group, an orgasm cannot be possible. In the latter group, while an orgasm might have resulted, the crying results from a feeling of guilt. These are different from a spontaneous cry occurring as a result of the fear of separation after an orgasm has been experienced.

GYMS – DANGER TO MARRIAGES

Recent studies across the world by a group of Christian Social Women Group has revealed that patronage of gyms are becoming a high risk option to sustainability of marriages.

The health and physical benefits of gyms not withstanding, the gyms are proving to be fertile grounds for infidelity and promiscuity. Some of the observations made are revealing:

First, the gym instructors prey on vulnerable women. A lot of married women have adopted the gym as a panacea to reducing weight and looking cutely attractive. Presumably because their spouses could be more attracted to their new curvy bodies. This makes them vulnerable to predating gym instructors who take advantage and seduce them. Touching the women at their most weakest areas opened them up for abuses and lasciviousness. Women biologically respond to tickles and fondles depending on which part of the body you touch. Gym instructors cunningly and constantly touch these spots when they observed them to break the emotional stability of those women. These over a period opens up those women for abuse. It was observed that these are prevalent with more affluent women and also lonely spouses.

Socialisation – The study also revealed that most marriages have suffered because the men or women have taken the gyms as their main centres of socialisation. When couples don’t find any reliable source of socialisation, they see the gym and the patrons as their most reliable friends, partners and joy. Most couples who attend the gym together do not face this risk. Couples who attend gyms alone are very prone to these dangers. After a period of socialising with the same opposite sex for a time, bonding becomes almost unavoidable. The more they train, chat, drink and sometimes eat together after the physical exercises, they become used to each other and sometimes share their marriage challenges. Unsuspecting partners are taken advantage of through a show of sympathy and sometimes outright deception and ill advice.

Targeting – Some men and women have intentionally joined gyms and clubs purposely to prey on a targeted victim. Many men and women have ignorantly fallen to wicked and deceitful men and women who have targeted them over a period. The targets may not know that these men and women have intentioned to have them for long and unsuspectingly opened up to them as gym mates and friends.

Facebook's first hub space in Africa to train 50,000 Nigerian youths

Written by Juliet Ebirim
~Vanguard Nigeria. Wednesday, May 30, 2018.

No fewer than 50,000 Nigerian youths would turn geeks by the time they go through the numerous training modules laid out by popular social media platform and technology company, Facebook.

The trainings would happen at the ultra modern hub space, first in the whole of Africa which it sited in Nigeria recently.

Facebook unveiled the space tagged NG_Hub in Lagos, announcing immediately that it was the first community hub space in Africa. The hub was established in partnership with Nigeria's talent curators, Co-creation Hub,CcHUB.

The hub, according to Facebook, highlights its ongoing commitment to supporting local talent in Nigeria even as it has planned a week-long celebration which will bring together developers, start-ups, and the wider tech community across Nigeria.

Unveiling the new multi-faceted space, Facebook's Vice President Partnerships, Mr Ime Archibong, said the centre is targeted towards bringing communities together to collaborate, learn and exchange ideas.

He said: "Technology provides expansive opportunities to engage young, creative and resourceful Nigerians, especially in delivering solutions to challenges across communities here in Nigeria. Our mission is to build community and bring the world closer together. "NG_Hub provides that physical space that will serve as a centre of learning and skills development in Lagos, and I'm excited about the possibilities that this will create."

Also, the Manager, Developer Programmes Facebook, Mr Emeka Afigbo, said the hub will help Facebook train 50,000 people in digital skills even as it is aimed to drive innovation in Nigeria's tech ecosystem.

Afigbo said the hub was also a deliberate design to equip Nigerian SMEs, tech entrepreneurs and the next generation of leaders to better understand and utilise the power of digital tools for economic growth.

On his part, Bosun Tijani, Founder/CEO of CcHub, said: "Our aim has always been to provide a viable platform for creators and innovators to express their talent and create solutions to the myriad of social and economic challenges faced by countries across the continent. Partnering with Facebook on NG_Hub enables us to achieve our objectives at scale and make the desired impact in the tech ecosystem here in Lagos."

Big boobs bring joy and pain - Obianuju

Written by Ayo Onikoyi.
~Vanguard Nigeria. Monday, May 28, 2018.

Obianuju
It is difficult enough to miss a beautiful woman in a crowd. And when that beautiful woman is blessed with monstrous towering twin towers, it is simply impossible not to notice her in a crowd. Such is the case of the Instagram sensation known as Obianujueo, an Information and Communications Engineering graduate, who has no claim to stardom but by posting her mere innocent, non-provocative pictures which have earned her close to 100 thousand followers.

Unlike the boobs-toting slay queens who have made the Instagram their hunting ground to poach randy men, Obianuju doesn't flaunt her boobs. No cleavage-bearing dresses or revealing apparels or provocative poses. She's simple, innocent and decent. It is only Mother Nature that has made her a goldfish that has no hiding place, on account of her sprawling mammary.

Regardless of her timidity and shyness, the IT graduate speaks with Potpourri on the joy and pain of being blessed with big boobs.

" One big problem of having big boobs is the attention you get. People keep staring and that could be very embarrassing. The other one is the backaches and the difficulty of wearing or getting bras that fit your boobs," she said.

" Getting clothes that fit you properly without your blouse jumping out is another problem. Then, the weight of the boobs. You keep on having bra marks on your shoulders," she added.

On the bright side, Obianuju admitted that you only feel blessed when you have learnt to fully love yourself the way you are

"You feel different from every other woman, like you are unique. You feel blessed. As for your relationship with men, it is almost always negative. Most of them come to you mainly because of the breast, so, it is difficult to tell who truly likes you," she said.
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