"Keep your Fork"

- Afrisonet

There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things "in order," she contacted her Priest and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in

Everything was in order and the Priest was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her.
"There's one more thing," she said excitedly.
"What's that?" came the Priest's reply..
"This is very important," the young woman continued. "I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand."
The Priest stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say.
That surprises you, doesn't it?" the young woman asked.
"Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request," said the Priest
The young woman explained. "My grandmother once told me this story, and from that time on I have always tried to pass along its message to those I love and those who are in need of encouragement. In all my years of attending socials and dinners, I always remember that when the dishes of the main course were being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, 'Keep your fork.' It was my favorite part because I knew that something better was coming...like velvety chocolate cake or deep-dish apple pie. Something wonderful, and with substance!'

So, I just want people to see me there in that casket with a fork in my hand and I want them to wonder "What's with the fork?" Then I want you to tell them: "Keep your fork ..the best is yet to come."
The Priest's eyes welled up with tears of joy as he hugged the young woman good-bye. He knew this would be one of the last times he would see her before her death. But he also knew that the young woman had a better grasp of heaven than he did. She had a better grasp of what heaven would be like than many people twice her age, with twice as much experience and knowledge. She KNEW that something better was coming.

At the funeral, people were walking by the young woman's casket and they saw the cloak she was wearing and the fork placed in her right hand. Over and over, the Priest heard the question, "What's with the fork?" And over and over he smiled.

During his message, the Priest told the people of the conversation he had with the young woman shortly before she died. He also told them about the fork and about what it symbolized to her. He told the people how he could not stop thinking about the fork and told them that they probably would not be able to stop thinking about it either.

He was right. So the next time you reach down for your fork let it remind you, ever so gently, that the best is yet to come.

The lover who refused to be used and dumped

By Candida
(Diary of a Divorced City Girl)

‘MOST times, lying with my husband watching him sleep on his back, beer belly rising and falling with each snore, he doesn’t look appetizing in the least -especially with his treble chin and bald head. I am starting to find him repulsive…” Melisa looked so forlorn as she told me about the state of her marriage that I had to laugh. She wasn’t amused.
I reminded her they’d just married 12 years and it was a bit early for her to start being resentful, especially when she has two adorable kids and a well heeled husband who gave her and the children virtually everything they wanted. “But what about meaningful sex, aunty C? Seun was fit and energetic when we got married with a body to die for.
Now he’s flabby and unattractive. His weight had more than doubled the only thing that hasn’t changed is his personality. He’s still kind and loving with a good sense of humor. Trouble is, I just don’t fancy him any more. I want rippling muscles – not rippling fat!”

I warned her to be extremely careful. After escaping the seven year-hitch, maybe,12 years is when her marriage should have started showing signs of being in a rut – she should strive for both of them to get out of it. “I don’t know about Seun,” she said simply, “but I’m trying my best to do just that. As a matter of fact, I’ve just met someone at work.
He is a technician we briefly used. Though he is single, he knows he’s nothing but a bit-on-the-side. And he’s so sexy. Instead of the usual boxers, he wears clinging lycra cycling shorts which makes him look deeply sexy. It is easy to get away to meet him as Seun works really late, now he’s been promoted to management level. Don’t get me wrong, I love Seun, but sex with Ephraim is like an icing on a cake.
I told her she was treading on dangerous grounds but she just laughed in my face. Months later, she came running back to me, “it is Seun” she said, a bit frightened, “it is as if he suspects I’m having an affair. Last night, he came outright to ask why we never seem to make love any more.
That I could get away quickly enough whenever he touched me. I told him not to be silly, that I love him, which I do, but I was always a bit tired. ‘Is it because I’ve put on a lot of weight,’ he asked me, ‘don’t worry about that. My new post means I could join any club I want and I have joined one with an impressive gym. You could come along too if you like, so we could get healthy together.’

“I assured him I would help him lose weight. But there’s another weight I have to lose – and that’s Ephraim. He is cute, but Seun is the man I love. I’m seeing him tonight. He’s had enough fun and it is time to let go….’” Well, it wasn’t as easy as she thought.

When we met some days later, she told me “That Ephraim is a lunatic. As soon as we settled down to our favorite meal at the restaurant where we usually went first before sex, I told him I wanted to call it a day, that my husband could be dangerous now he was suspicious. I thought he’d be fine – after all we both knew all we could have was fun no-strings sex. But his face hanged.
‘You can’t just dump me like that’, he fumed. ‘I really love you’, ‘I was shocked, ‘look’, I told him gently, ‘you’re a lovely man, but I want to concentrate on my marriage’. I was really put off by his sudden declaration of love. Our arrangement had nothing to do with that. “He glared angrily at me, ‘Oh really?’ he spat. ‘You should have thought of that before.’ With that he stormed out of the door.
I felt sick and shaken. But at least it was done and over with Thank goodness I hadn’t given him my mobile number. So, I kept that turned off when I was at home. Better to be safe than be sorry!
“As soon as I switched it on the next day, there were pleading text messages from him and more kept on pinging I erased them all. He had to understand we were now history. And as Seun’s flab began to melt, his treble chin slimmered down and his beer belly shrunk…
I found myself thinking about Ephraim less and less. Then last Saturday when I was vacuuming, there was a knock on the door. I was irritated thinking Seun had forgotten his key again. He’d nipped out to the gym to meet a few friends.
Only pulling open the door, I found Ephraim glaring at me. `So I’ve finally tracked you down’ he snarled. “Why have you been ignoring my text messages?” I couldn’t believe my eyes and ears. Was he mad? “You have to go”, I yelled at him, terrified Seun would arrive any minute, `I’ve told you over’.
“I tried to shut the door in his face, but he went berserk. Booting the front door open, he pushed his way into the flat.’ I love you Melisa’, he wined, ‘and I’m not leaving your house until you admit you love me too’ His eyes were bulging. He looked really demented. If I didn’t get him out of the flat soon, Seun would come back and find out about everything.

‘Ok, ok, 1 love you too, now go!” How could I have found this simpleton sexy? I fumed silently.

“He calmed down and eventually left, but not before issuing an ultimatum. ‘Start seeing me again’ he threatened, ‘or I’ll tell your husband everything’, I told him to get lost! Since then, I haven’t seen him, not even at work since he knows where my office is.
But every time the door bell rings, I’m edgy, terrified it’s him, Seun is now looking great and our marriage is the best it’s been for a long time, I just pray Ephraim doesn’t come back and ruin it all. Why are some men so childish?

A single girl that goes out with a married man doesn’t believe it would be a happy-ever-after relationship. So, why can’t a married woman do the same with the hope that the man would be grateful for a few free bunks?” Shows you how naive some people are.
I reminded her that she must know of a few men whose bits-on-the- sides have turned to second wives they never really bargained for.
And if a young married woman is having an affair, she’s sending the signal her marriage is not happy and what gullible lover wouldn’t think he might just be better than her husband – enough to take her away from him!

40 tips for a better life

Sent by Hiyab Tsegay - Eritrea

1. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.

2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Sleep for 7 hours.
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Play more games.
6. Read more books than you did in last year.
7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink plenty of water.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
14. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
15. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
16. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
17. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
18. Smile and laugh more.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
23. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about. Don't compare your partner with others.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
25. Forgive everyone for everything.
26. What other people think of you is none of your business.
27. GOD heals everything.
28. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
29. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
30. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
31. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
32. The best is yet to come.
33. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
34. Do the right thing!
35. Call your family often.
36. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.
37. Each day give something good to others.
38. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
39. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
40. Please tell everyone you care about this 40 tips for a better life .

Never let yesterday's disappointments overshadow tomorrow's dreams!

A Child's Prayer

"Please send  clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy's computer......

Amen" !!! 

The unemployed graduate

Sent by: Matilda Williams - S'Leone

An unemployed graduate woke up one morning and checked his pocket. All he had left was $10. He decided to use it to buy food and then wait for death as he was too proud to go begging. He was frustrated as he could find no job, and nobody was ready to help him.

He bought food and as he sat down to eat, an old man and two little children came along and asked him to help them with food as they had not eaten for almost a week. He looked at them. They were so lean that
he could see their bones coming out. Their eyes had gone into the socket.

With the last bit of compassion he had, he gave them the food. The old man and children prayed that God would bless and prosper him and then gave him a very old coin. The young graduate said to them "you need the prayer more than I do".

With no money, no job, no food, the young graduate went under the bridge to rest and wait for death. As he was about to sleep, he saw an old newspaper on the ground. He picked it up, and suddenly he saw an
advertisement for people with old coins to come to a certain address.

He decided to go there with the old coin the old man gave him. On getting to the place, he gave the proprietor the coin. The proprietor screamed, brought out a big book and showed the young graduate a
photograph. This same old coin was worth 3 million dollars. The young graduate was overjoyed as the proprietor gave him a bank draft for 3million dollars within an hour. He collected the Bank Draft and went
in search of the old man and little children.

By the time he got to where he left them eating, they had gone. He asked the owner of the canteen if he knew them. He said no but they left a note for you. He quickly opened the note thinking it would lead him to find them.
This is what the note said: "You gave us your all and we have rewarded you back with the coin" Signed God the Father, The Son and The Holy Ghost.

What do you know about men

Authur unknown

Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.

Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.

A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaners. These men usually have jobs and bathe.

All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.

Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.

Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in cold weather, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.

Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed; get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo."

Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.

If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.

When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.

When four or more women get together, they talk about men.

Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"

If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget... he didn't lose your number... he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.

Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you... I want to marry you... I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.

Men forget everything; women remember everything.

That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

When your woman is cheating

By Ebele Peters - Nigeria

The late nights at the office and the fact that she switches off her cell phone may get your suspicions aroused, but how can you really be sure that your woman is cheating on you?

I must first point out though, that when a woman cheats, what usually drives her into looking at another man is usually miles away from what compels a man to cheat. For most men, the desire to cheat mostly stems from their desire to spread their wild oats and an innate inability for a lot of them to be monogamous. For women, on the other hand, most of them cheat when their needs in the relationship are unmet.
This is not an excuse for women to cheat, but when a woman is unhappy in her relationship, the man better watch out, because women are just as inclined to have affairs when they feel disconnected from their relationships. Another major reason women cheat, stems from the desire for material wealth which their partners may not be in a position to provide.
To help out today, we shall look at some of the signs to look out for if you have had, even the slightest suspicion that your woman is not being faithful.

There was a time she would blow hot and cold just because you were spending too much time with your friends, work or anywhere else but with her. Then suddenly, she doesn’t mind any longer. You can now spend as much free time apart, she assures you. If that’s happening it’s time to be introspective. Now don’t misinterpret this to mean that she’s certainly cheating, but you really should take note when issues that used to bother her in the past become inconsequential. It just might be that another man has taken her fancy, or she’s ready to move on. Then again, it may be necessary to add that things that used to bother her in the past may become less important as she gets older and has more responsibilities to deal with such as children and a hectic work schedule.

There was a time she wanted you to take her out even if it were to just sit down on a bench in an open field and talk about nothing. Then she doesn’t even bother and gone are the days when she used to ask, “Are you not taking me out today?” You had better take measures to retrace your steps if you’re still interested in the relationship because it just maybe she is on her way out.

When the nagging suddenly stops!There was a time she wanted to talk to you and be heard. If suddenly she doesn’t raise an eyebrow at the slightest thing, chances are that some other man is putting in time to listen to her. Women need that emotional connection that sharing brings and this develops into the emotional attachment before sexual attachment develops. If your girlfriend has stopped telling you details of her day at work, or sharing her feelings with you, then there must be a problem somewhere.

She suddenly becomes the most indispensable person at her place of work, and starts working long hours into the night. She now comes home late and leaves earlier that she used to in the morning, thereby keeping communication and physical intimacy to the barest minimum. Well this may be a tell tale sign for you to try to figure out if indeed all this time is being spent at work.

When she keeps her phone in silent mode for long hours or switches it off completely once she’s home. Even when she does take calls, her conversation is not free flowing, she avoids calling out the caller’s name and answers mostly in monosyllables, it is very likely that she’s taking to someone she’d rather you never found out.

When she suddenly starts coming home with expensive gifts or pieces of jewelry you know for certain you did not get her or she can ill afford, there’s a major likelihood that she’s being looked after by another man with the means.

You had told her from the outset of the relationship that you love her for who she is, and assured her that whether she was fat or slim, tall or short did not matter. When the relationship was good, she never worried about her being too fat or too slim, but suddenly, it becomes an issue and even an obsession. Maybe someone somewhere has asked her to lose some weight or put on a bit more. That someone most likely, is a man outside.

If you once had a healthy sex life and lots of intimacy, then she suddenly starts avoiding your advances, she’s probably doing so because this is one area woman are particularly bad at multitasking. Once a woman is emotionally involved with another man, it is very unlikely that she’ll find you attractive. Sometimes your attempts to touch her will make her cringe inwardly and she’ll do everything in her power to avoid intimacy.
Finding out if your partner is unfaithful or not starts from the time you accept that there is a possibility they are cheating. First you have to determine the status of your relationship. If you have given your all, been faithful and loyal, then there should be no grounds for your partner to cheat. But if you have not, chances are that they will cheat.

Then again, if you’ve given your best emotionally and you notice that the relationship is based on monetary and material gains which you are unwilling to provide or don’t have the wherewithal to do so, chances are that a woman who is impossible to satisfy will look elsewhere. If you are in this sort of relationship, it will best for you to move on because you’ll only end up with a broken heart and delusional that all women are like that.

There are ups and downs in every relationship, so it’s necessary that you bear in mind that one of these signs by itself does not always signify that your partner is cheating. If you notice just one or two of the signs, then there is still a possibility that you can remedy the relationship. But my dear when you see multiple signs, then you have to see the red light flashing because if even she hasn’t started cheating, there’s a major likelihood that she’s on the prowl for another man. So try to take the steps necessary to protect one of your most important assets - your sanity and well being.

A Farmer's Donkey

Sent by Moudyzvakabvira KAHOBA - Zimbabwe

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well.

The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.

Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway;
it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him.
They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well.
At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly.
Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well.
He was astonished at what he saw.
With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing.
He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal,
he would shake it off and take a step up.
Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt.

The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up.

Each of our troubles is a stepping stone.

We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up!

Shake it off and take a step up.
_______________________________

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happens.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less from people but more from God.

Boundary Setting for the Work Obsessed

Sent by Kouassi Etien.
Email: kouassie2002@yahoo.com

Boundary Setting for the Work Obsessed

Yes !

Do you find yourself waking in the middle of the night, thinking about work?

Do you check your work email at home in the evenings or on weekends?

Do your family and friends get tired of hearing you talk about work?

Do you frequently take work home with you?

Do you find yourself thinking about work issues when you’re supposedly doing something recreational?

If you checked more than one or two of these as yes, then you may be obsessed with your work. Consider some of the following ideas for setting boundaries that will help you to separate your professional and personal lives.

1. Choose flow-inducing hobbies that really engage you and pull your mind away from work.

Flow is a sense of effortless engagement in what you’re doing. You’ll find it in activities that have clear objectives and challenge you to stretch a bit beyond your current level of skill. What kind of hobbies can produce flow? Sports like martial arts or soccer, games like poker or bridge, art like painting or pottery, and puzzles like crosswords or sudoku are a few examples. Such activities will lure you away from thoughts about work because, unlike passive activities such as watching TV, they can provide the same sense of engagement and challenge that your work life offers.

2. Set goals in your personal life just like you do in your professional life.

Working towards goals is a sure way of getting yourself excited enough about non-work activities that you can pull yourself away work. This tip works in tandem with the first, because goal-oriented activities are more likely to provide a sense of flow than activities taken on for relaxation.

3. Schedule dates with other people for non-work activities.

For example, arrange to meet a friend for drinks and conversation after work, or make weekend plans with your friends or family to go hiking. Solo plans are easier to break in favour of work. If you have a commitment to another person, you’ll be more likely to shut the laptop and mobile phone off.

4. Use tech boundaries to separate your work and your life.

Think about whether you need to create different computer, email, and instant messaging accounts for personal versus professional activities. If you have access to all your work tools when you log in to upload vacation photos or video chat with a friend, you’re likely to get drawn into work email and work tasks even when you intend otherwise.

5. Decide your “no’s” in advance.

Figure out which types of activities in your work life just aren’t worth the time you put in. This might be meeting people for lunch, attending unnecessary meetings, or taking on extra projects that require weekend work. Whatever your low-value activities are, make a rule up front to say “no” instead of deciding on a case-by-case basis. This way you’ll leave more room for your personal life and boost your professional effectiveness at the same time.

UNHCR Management Minute

Vital Virtues - the human angle !

Sent by: Hiyab Tsegay (MONUC)

TRUST
TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is."

Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".

NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?"
The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistake too.

CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my
leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."

There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband ,because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.

NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..

RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other,we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted,"Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me.Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered ,"You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.

PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home,a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey?"Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.

Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you." Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders.

It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river. You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear.

BE PATIENT
This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the
hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy,I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or you wish to take revenge. Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

Why a wedding ring should be put on the fourth finger??

Sent by: Hiyab Tsegay (MONUC)

Thumb represents parents
Second finger represents brothers and sisters
Center finger represents own self
Fourth finger represents your partner
Last finger represents your children
Really interesting !

Why the wedding ring should be put on the fourth finger??
Please follow the step below, really God made this a miracle (this is from a Chinese excerpt)

Firstly, show your palm,

Bend the center finger and put together back to back.

Secondly, the rest 4 fingers join tips to tips as illustrated below.

Now the Game begins... !!

Follow the arrangement below:

You have 5 paired fingers

Try to open your thumb, the thumb represents parents, so it can be open because for a man or woman shall leave his/her parents to form his/her own family and also all human go through sickness and death. Which means our parents will leave us one day.

Please close up your thumb, then open your second finger pair, the finger represents brothers and sisters, they do have their own family and will leave us too.
Now close up your second finger, open up your little finger pair, this represents your children. Sooner or later they too will leave us for they have their own lives to live.

Nevertheless, close up your little finger, try to open your fourth finger on which we put our wedding rings; you will be surprised to find that it cannot be opened at all. Because it represents husband and wife, this whole life you will be attached to each other.
Real love will stick together forever and ever .

Amazing Mathematics

Sent by Benjamin Kennechuque Mogor

Beauty of Mathematics !!!!!!!
Hint:You may need your calculator to verify)!

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321

1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111

9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888
Brilliant, isn't it?

And look at this symmetry:

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321

Now, take a look at this...

101%
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:
What Equals 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been in situations where someone wants you to GIVE OVER 100%.
How about ACHIEVING 101%?

What equals 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help
answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

If: H-A-R-D-W-O- R- K
8+1+18+4+23+ 15+18+11 = 98%

And: K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E
11+14+15+23+ 12+5+4+7+ 5 = 96%

But: A-T-T-I-T-U- D-E
1+20+20+9+20+ 21+4+5 = 100%

THEN, look how far the love of God will take you:
L-O-V-E-O-F- G-O-D
12+15+22+5+15+ 6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:
While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, It's the Love of God that will put you over the top!

LOVE IS PRICELESS

From: Ayodeji FANIYAN

A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups.
And set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down into the eyes of
little boy. "Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies."
"Well," said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat off
the back of his neck, "These puppies come from fine
par parents and cost a good deal of money."

The boy dropped his head for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer.
"I've got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?"
"Sure," said the farmer. And with that he let out a
whistle. "Here, Dolly!" he called. Out from the
doghouse and down the ramp ran.

Dolly followed by four little balls of fur. The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight.

As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the
doghouse. Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid. Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up... "I want that one," the little boy said, pointing to the runt. The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, "Son, you don't want that puppy. He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would."

With that the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers.
In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a
specially made shoe.
Looking back up at the farmer, he said, "You see sir, I don't run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands."

With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup. Holding it carefully handed it to the little boy. "How much?" asked the little boy. "No charge," answered the farmer, "There's no charge for love."

The world is full of people who need someone who understands.

Three Bullets

From: GRACE SANDUKU/Ayodeji FANIYAN

There once was a man who had nothing for his family to eat.
He had an old rifle and three bullets. So, he decided that he would go out hunting and kill some wild game for dinner.
As he went down the road, he saw a rabbit. He shot at the rabbit and missed it. The rabbit ran away.
Then he saw a squirrel and fired a shot at the squirrel and missed it. The squirrel disappeared into a hole in a cottonwood tree.
As he went further, he saw a large wild "Tom" turkey in the tree, but he had only one bullet remaining.
A voice spoke to him and said, "Pray first, aim high and stay focused.
However, at the same time, he saw a deer which was a better kill.
He brought the gun down and aimed at the deer. But, then he saw a rattlesnake between his legs about to bite him, so he naturally brought the gun down further to shoot the rattlesnake.
Still, the voice said again to him, "I said 'Pray, Aim high and Stay focused."
So, the man decided to listen to God's voice.
He prayed, then aimed the gun high up in the tree and shot the wild turkey.
The bullet bounced off the turkey and killed the deer.
The handle fell off the gun and hit the snake in the head and killed it. And, when the gun had gone off, it knocked him into a pond.
When he stood up to look around, he had fish in all his pockets, a dead deer and a turkey to eat for his family.
The snake (Satan) was dead simply because the man listened to God.

Moral of the story:
Pray first before you do anything, aim and shoot high in your goals, and stay focused on God.
Never let others discourage you concerning your past. The past is exactly that, "the past."
Live every day one day at a time and remember that only God knows our future and that he will not put you through any more than
you can bear.
Do not look to man for your blessings, but look to the doors that only He has prepared in advance for you in your favor.
Wait, be still and patient: keep God first and everything else will follow.

The Gift !

Sent by Caroline Ikpa
A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted. As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car.

Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautiful wrapped gift box. Curious, but somewhat Disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angrily, he raised his voice to his father and said, "With all your money you give me a Bible?, and stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible.

Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.
When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. His father had carefully underlined a verse, Matt 7:11, "And if ye, being evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Heavenly father which is in heaven, give to those who ask Him?"

As he read those words, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words...PAID IN FULL.

How many times do we miss God's blessings because they are not packaged as we expected? Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for...

IF YOUR GIFT IS NOT PACKED THE WAY YOU WANT IT, IT'S BECAUSE IT IS BETTER PACKED THAT WAY! ALWAYS APPRECIATE LITTLE THINGS !

Fanning the embers of a dying love

By Chinyere Fred Adegbulugbe

What do you do when you wake up and suddenly ask yourself who the person lying beside you really is? When you wonder how you ended up having such a person as your spouse, then there is trouble. That was exactly how Roberts described his relationship with his wife until recently. "I would ask myself what the stranger was doing beside me. Not only had she changed so much physically that I could hardly recognise her even when I took a closer look, her attitude was completely different. She became very cantankerous and at a point, I told myself I wasn‘t going to go on with that marriage unless I was ready to die of frustration,” he recalls.

Did he divorce her thereafter? Surprisingly, Roberts said no. As a matter of fact, according to him, his marriage at present, is as happy as he could ever wish for. What then happened? ”After so many complaints to friends, who had no useful advice to give me, I decided to find a solution to my unhappiness. First, I realised that my wife had become overweight despite the fact that she was working so hard. Not only was she going out everyday, our three small children usually kept her so busy that she hardly ever had any free time for herself. Now the question I asked myself was this: how could a woman, who is so much hard-working and ever busy, gain so much weight?

”After some time, I discovered that she was stuffing herself with food, every little time she had. She was simply ever eating.

“Then the truth came out: just like me, she was also not happy with the turn our marriage had taken. Though of course her disillusion about the marriage came before mine and she took refuge in eating. And, as a result, she was gaining weight on a daily basis and was quite helpless about it. Her new looks, which looked natural, did not even make matters any better for her. That also affected her attitude, as she became bitter and would snap at me or the children at the very slightest provocation.”

Well, Roberts said he decided to become more loving towards her since she confessed that it was his uncaring attitude that made her to take solace in food. And unknown to him also, she was already romancing with alcohol, though she managed to conceal that part from him and the children.

So what steps did he take to bring their relationship to what it used to be?

"I made up my mind to become her lover once again. Every weekend, I would take her out, while the children stayed back home with the nanny. Even when we had little money, we would go to an eatery and just eat, sit and chat for as long as we wanted. Then I also made it a matter of a rule that I would not attend any party without her by my side. My friends were wondering what was wrong with me. Apart from business meetings, you would see me with my wife at any gathering. That, of course, meant that the time I usually spent with the ‘boys‘ was no longer there, but I didn‘t mind one bit. And it paid off. With time, the smile started returning to her face. She became much nicer, even to the children. True laughter returned to our home and we started working on her weight, together.

“Now we can actually say we are happily married.”

To think that his marriage would have packed up two years ago if he hadn‘t decided to tackle the challenges. The mere thought of it, he says, makes him to shudder. But that goes to simply re-echo what many marriage experts have always said: marriage isn‘t a bed of roses. Therefore, for one to have a good one, you must be ready to work at it. It doesn‘t come on a platter of gold, not at all. That is one lesson Roberts has had to learn.

The Parable Of Brother Leo

- Michael Josephson.

An old legend tells of a French monastery that was well-known throughout Europe because of the extraordinary leadership of a man known only as Brother Leo.
Several monks began a pilgrimage to visit Brother Leo to learn from him. Almost immediately, the monks began to bicker as to who should do various chores. On the third day they met another monk who was also going to the monastery.
This monk never complained or shirked a duty. Whenever the others would fight over a chore, he would gracefully volunteer to do it himself. By the last day, the other monks were following his example, and everyone worked together smoothly.
When they reached the monastery and asked to see Brother Leo, the man who greeted them laughed. "But our brother is among you!" pointing to the fellow who had joined them late in the trip.
Today, many people seek leadership positions not so much for what they can do for others, but for what the position can do for them: status, connections, perks, or future advantages. As a result, they do service primarily as an investment, a way to build an impressive résumé.
The parable about Brother Leo teaches another model of leadership, where leaders are more preoccupied with serving than being followed, with giving than getting, with doing than demanding. It's leadership based on example, not command. It's called servant leadership.
Can you imagine how much better things would be if more politicians, educators, and business executives saw themselves as servant leaders?

Show your friends how much you care.

One day, when I was a freshman in high school,
I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.
His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books.
I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday?
He must really be a nerd.'
I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him.
They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.
His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him.
He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes
My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.

As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks.'
They really should get lives.
' He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'
There was a big smile on his face.
It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.
As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before.
He said he had gone to private school before now.
I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.

He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.
I asked him if he wanted to play a little football
with my friends
He said yes.
We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.
I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!
He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends...

When we were seniors we began to think about college.
Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.

I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.
He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship...

Kyle was valedictorian of our class.
I teased him all the time about being a nerd.

He had to prepare a speech for graduation.
I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.

Graduation day, I saw Kyle.
He looked great.
He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school.
He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.

He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.
Boy, sometimes I was jealous! Today was one of those days.

I could see that he was nervous about his speech.
So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!'
He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled.
' Thanks,' he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began

'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years.
Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...
I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.
I am going to tell you a story.'

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the first day we met.
He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.
He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.
'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable...'

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile.

Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions...

With one small gesture you can change a person's life.
For better or for worse.

God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way.
Look for God in others.

'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.'

There is no beginning or end...

Yesterday is history.

Tomorrow is a mystery.

Today is a gift.

- National Friendship Week

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy

- Anonymous

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.
One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs.
His bed was next to the room's only window.
The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.
The men talked for hours on end.
They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.
The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake.
Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene.
One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man could not hear the band, he could see it in his mind s eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days, weeks and months passed.
One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep.
She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away
As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.
He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.
It faced a blank wall.
The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.
She said, 'Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.'

Epilogue:
There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.
Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy.

'Today is a gift, that is why it is called The Present .'

The 3 Deadly Mistakes Women Make With Men Without EVER Realizing It.

Christian Carter a relationship expert in a book, Catch Him, keep Him : A woman’s guide to finding Mr Right and keeping Him identified that these 3 three mistakes are responsible for more failed dates and relationships with men than any other factors.
Here they are:

Leading A Man To Think You Are “Needy” And “Insecure” Did you know that there are 6 ways you can set off a man’s “Insecurity Alert” and make him think twice about pursuing a relationship with you? Sadly, even confident women often “accidentally” give off one of these signs... and just one can kill the chance of a man asking you on a second date. As you read through these signals men pick up on as “needy” and unattractive, ask yourself if YOU have ever been guilty of committing one of these deadly mistakes:

Talking or saying nasty things about your past boyfriends. Saying bad things about men you have been involved with actually reflects negatively back on YOU. It makes a man worry you are carrying around “baggage” that HE will have to deal with should he become involved with you.

Speaking negatively about other women. When women call other women names like “slut”, “bitch”, and “crazy”, it is anything impressive to a man you are attracted with. Women will often do this when they see a good looking, desirable woman, especially if they feel their man might be attracted to her. This just makes a man think you are trying to cover up your own insecurities, and looking for validation and attention. Not good.

Too much physical contact, especially in public. If you are constantly hanging on a man or touching him too much he’ll start to see it as clingy behavior... but you’ll never hear about this from him. It’s far better to save your touches for short and infrequent moments that will surprise and enchant him.

Appealing To His “Sexual” Side Instead Of His Emotional Side Many women make the mistake of thinking that men are primarily driven by sex alone... and think if they can attract a man SEXUALLY they will be able to attract him EMOTIONALLY as well. Women too often give up sex to a man in the hopes that it will translate into a relationship and get them what they want. In reality, a man has the capacity to view a sexual connection and an emotional connection as two entirely different things, and it requires a special set of skills to mould these two things together in a man’s mind... and keep them connected. Men are out for far more than just sex... and a woman who knows how to fulfill a man EMOTIONALLY and SEXUALLY will be the woman who captures a man’s heart... and gets that same fulfillment for HERSELF.

In a moment, I’ll show you how you can learn to do just that... Not Knowing How To Size Up A Man’s “Relationship Potential” A lot of women will decide whether or not they should put energy into building a relationship with a man based on ATTRACTION.
Yes, attraction is important. But it can also be DANGEROUS. When we feel a strong sense of attraction for someone, it can cause us to override our logic and ignore our instincts... leading us to overlook potential partner’s deadly faults that could spell trouble down the road. If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in a relationship that is dragging you down, this is probably why. It’s important to be able to size a guy up and spot any “warning signs” of a future bad relationship FAST... so you don’t waste any of your time or emotional energy on someone who isn’t right for you... or who will leave you heartbroken. Fortunately this is a fairly easy thing to do...