Rub-a-dub master, Ras Kimono dies at 60

~TheGuardian Nigeria. Monday, June 11, 2018

Ras Kimono

Ras Kimono, a giant of Nigerian music for over three decades, has passed away. He died yesterday morning. Born on May 9, 1958 to parents from Delta State, he recently celebrated his 60th birthday amidst fanfare.
Respected for being a dogged fighter and stickler to perfection, the late musician, performed with top reggae artistes such as, Shaggy, Shaba Ranks, Lee Perry, the late Lucky Dube, Culture, Inna Circle, Steve Wonder, Eve and K.C. and JoJo and a host of others.

He developed his own style of root reggae music that skillfully blended his African roots with classical Jamaican rhythm. This unique genre took him out of the country, where he played in major concerts in the United States, England, Italy, Kenya, Ghana and Papua New Guinea where his Benson and Hedges stadium concerts attracted a record average of 45,000 people per concert.

The last time he visited The Guardian office; he brimmed in confidence, promising to change the trend of music in the country.

He was dressed in a white top, with green, black, yellow and white stripes. He had a blue jean trouser, with brown trainers. His beret was green, yellow and red. He had eyeglasses on. Looking every inch younger, except for the frame that had grown heavier.

"Our music is growing. My only disappointment is that nobody is playing live music anymore. Everybody is miming and that's not good for professional instrumentalists in the music industry," he said.

He continued, tThe problem with youths here is that they are always looking for easy way out to make quick money. Sometimes, you will see young guys come up to say to you, 'uncle I'm into music'. He gives you what he has done, and you will be surprised that the music has no quality, and that it is not done out of passion, but just for the money. They are always seeking easy money and fame. Since there is easy access to laptop and keyboard, you can programme what you want to. To make it worse, a lot of TV stations play these songs. You are now forced to ask what is National Broadcasting Commission doing and why there are no Not To Be Broadcast (NTBB) tag on them. Some of the lyrics are vulgar and are played on air and NBC is not doing anything about it. In the US, there are club versions and radio version. They just do one version and this is what is played on air. Easy lyrics. Some of the youths, who play this music don't have conscience. Give them four to five years and they will fade out completely."

Where exactly are the wife materials?!

Diary of a Divorced City Girl by Emmanuel Okogba
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, June 17, 2018.

HAVE you noticed it's taking men a long time to settle down these days and make an honest woman of one of the 'catches' they always have on the leash? When Joseph hit his 30s, I often counselled him on the advantages of settling down and having all his children whilst he was young. "What's the hurry," he always told me.
A suave gentleman with a good job and a nice to-die-for pad, he believed it wouldn't be an effort to meet a partner when he was good and ready to settle down. He recently hit 40, and a dad to an adorable son whose mother doesn't want to get married! "I couldn't really believe it when she told me", Joseph said, scandalised. "I was too old for her? Too old?

She was in her mid 20s, when we met and already had a child.

"When she became pregnant, I grudgingly decided to ask her to be my wife thinking she would be grateful to have a stepfather for her child. She was also for it at first, but after she had the child, she told me she didn't think I was financially buoyant enough to look after her and two children. That her furniture business was doing well and she would rather be on her own. I was free to visit my son any time I wished and contribute to his upbringing. I was speechless. Not even my mother could talk her round. She's put a big dent in my self-esteem, I tell you! I'm now 40 and don't think I'll ever have a genuine girlfriend to make my wife. I want to settle down and have children by one woman. As things are now, it seems I've mucked up and made a mess of my future. It's true I loved clubbing and each weekend, I'd take home a different girl and we'd have a great time.


"I was young and all I wanted was sex and more sex and I didn't see anything wrong with what I was doing – that was until now. To my embarrassment, I've discovered, that no decent girl will come near me. Yes, I do get girls, but they've been around a bit, and I've slept with most of them. Just before the end of the year, I went to an office and met a lot of girls having a natter. It so happened that, out of the seven of them, I'd slept with five.

"They greeted me warmly but I was shaking in my shoes with embarrassment. I was sure that as soon as I left, they'd be having a good gossip at my expense! I don't want that kind of life again. I know its' my fault that I suddenly found myself out of the market. I mean, I never dreamt I would get involved with a single mother, not to think of such a person giving me the elbow!

What you expect from your marriage is not what you often get!

Written by Bunmi Sofola
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, June 17, 2018.

Couple

WILL the average person experiencing problems in their relationship know the right time to walk away? It goes without saying that divorce now is quick and with little rancour, single parenthood is on the increase and more men opt for the single life despite the fact that eligible women are two a penny (seemingly). Yet, never before has there been that fear of uncertainty in abandoning a relationship that was obviously going nowhere than now. A few months ago, I ran into a friend's daughter and asked after her mother.

Sheepishly, she told me it was a long time she saw her mother last as she was now living with her fiance. That would have been perfectly in order if it was what she wanted too. "I would have preferred for us to get married", she shrugged, "but he doesn't want to commit himself until I'm pregnant".

What happens if she gets pregnant, gets married, and later has a miscarriage? Will the man abandon her some two years later if she can't conceive again? These questions and lots more ran through my mind but I didn't want to make the poor girl more miserable than she already was. She is currently hopping from one gynaecologist to the other and when I asked her if the love of her life had gone for a test too, she said it wasn't necessary as he'd already fathered a child. I wanted to tell her that was no proof. That I knew a few 'surrogate' fathers who'd made a few 'barren' women mothers. The legal fathers are none the wiser and the mothers are now free of criticisms and jibes from their in-laws. Their marriage seems to be on an even keel.

The situation that gives a lot of concern is where the couples know that their marriage is lying on its back with its hooves virtually in the air but sit tight and hope that things will get better.

Unfortunately, they seldom do. Boma, a retired industrial nurse in her 60s now sits alone in her lovely house, wishing she'd had the common sense to kick her wayward husband out of their matrimonial home when she realized he was a bum despite the fact that he was a medical doctor. "I had a very shrewd father who believed in putting a bit by for the rainy day", she said. "When I was working after my training in England, he was always urging me to save and send whatever I could home so he could buy me some property. His letter bothered on an irritation at times but his insistence goaded me into doing temporary jobs – and petty-trading along with my regular job so I could send him money. He always made up for the balance and thanks to him, when we came back, I had a few plots of land here and there.

Toxic effect of pornography on relationships

Written by Bunmi Sofola
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, June 17, 2018.

In my early teens, I vividly remember sneaking into our father's bedroom from time to time, my heart always in my throat for fear of being caught. I was drawn to a stack of Playboy magazines my dad had surreptitiously hidden amongst flies he always brought from the office," said Ephraim. He's now 28, has a fantastic job and a string of girlfriends-but is not thinking of marriage yet. He is now a member of millions of online pornographic junkies. "As I salivated over the 'full frontal' centrefold, with those glamorous models spread-eagled across pages with come-to-bed eyes and staples through their midriffs-I rushed to my room and masturbated.
"Only, as I grow older, my experience of porn has been very different from my dad's. I'm part of the new generation of men to grow up with internet pornography as part and parcel of everyday life. I've never had to pay for it nor faced the embarrassment of asking for it. When I get tired of one image, there's always another… and another… and another. All I need do is type the words: 'free porn' into an internet search engine and there'd be thousands of hits, with most sites containing hundreds of pornographic images.

"Internet porn was part of my life throughout my early 20s and now at 28; I'm increasingly aware that I have a problem. I'm not yet ready to admit I'm an addict, but there's no denying that internet porn has become a deeply ingrained daily habit. As it is now, I struggle to get through a day without at least one visit to one of my favourite sites.

I'm sure a lot of your readers will be mouthing a silent: 'Yuk' as they read this and I entirely understand their reaction. But what they need to know is that I'm certainly not alone-I'm convinced that virtually every man of my age with access to the internet will log on to internet porn sites on a reasonably regular basis. You see, men, by and large, like porn and enjoy using it-it is getting caught using it that they don't like.

"Today, soft-core porn barely exists. Internet porn is now almost entirely 'hard-core'- which involves female and male models graphically engaged in an extraordinary variety of real sex acts. For years, I thought my internet porn habit was having no effect on my relationships in real life. I was confident I could keep internet sex and real sex separate.

Cardiac disease can kill suddenly during physical exercise -Expert

A consultant physician and cardiologist at the University of Nigeria Teaching Hospital, Enugu, Prof. Benedict Anisiuba, discusses sudden cardiac death with DOLAPO AKITOYE

~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, June 10, 2018.

What is sudden cardiac death?

Sudden cardiac death is a non-traumatic, unexpected fatal event occurring

within one hour of the outset of symptoms in an apparently healthy individual. However, if the death occurs when nobody is present, this definition can also be extended to when the person was in good health 24 hours before being discovered to be dead but if the death is witnessed within one hour of the outset of symptoms, it is sudden cardiac death.

What can cause sudden cardiac death?

It seems that most abnormalities in the body can cause sudden death, whether cardiac or non-cardiac but generally, cardiovascular diseases - diseases of the heart and blood vessels - are more notorious in causing sudden cardiac death but apart from that, diseases of the respiratory system, of the brain and of course, poisoning can also be responsible for it. With regards to the cardiovascular system, the most common disease that causes sudden cardiac death is hypertension and its complications. Hypertension is the leading cause of sudden cardiac death. With most people that die from sudden cardiac death, there is evidence of hypertension in about 70 per cent of them.

Hypertension tops the list followed by heart failure and also, thickening of the walls of the heart which is called left ventricular hypertrophy in medicine. This can result from many causes such as hypertension, sub-congenital diseases and myocardial infarction (heart attack). Heart attack means that the blood vessel taking blood to the heart is blocked. It is also one of the important causes of sudden cardiac death. So, part of the heart dies when the blood supply to it is blocked. It is one of the most important causes in the developed world.

It is catching up in our own part of the world but not as much as in the developed world. For the respiratory diseases, the one that comes easily to mind is acute bronchial asthma. Severe bronchial asthma can definitely lead to sudden death including blockage of the blood vessels going to the lungs referred to as pulmonary embolism.

Diseases of the central nervous system, especially the brain, can also lead to sudden cardiac death especially sudden bleeding in the brain due to abnormal blood vessels which can be congenital (before birth) or acquired (developed along the line). The most obvious cause is severe chemical or drug poisoning. If somebody either intentionally or accidentally takes a dangerous chemical, the person will, of course, die suddenly. This is in addition to drug overdose which can be intentional or accidental.

What are the symptoms that can lead to sudden cardiac death?

By definition, the person is not supposed to have any symptom until one hour before the outset of cardiac death but as can be seen from the causes of sudden cardiac death, there is always some subtle abnormality that is present which is ignored by the doctor, individual or society. However, nobody is to blame. Some of these symptoms are common in the environment that they can always take people to the theatre and start exploring the heart or the brain but generally, the symptoms that precede sudden cardiac death include sudden outset of breathlessness. This can occur either from heart failure or from pulmonary embolism. Breathlessness is a very important symptom leading to sudden cardiac death.

Sex toy: A handy helpmate

~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, June 10, 2018.

Sex toys are still largely shrouded in certain social taboos in many cultures, especially in this part of the world. This however, does not come as a surprise since many people still find it difficult to discuss sex and sexuality issues even privately, not to think of expressing their sexuality, preferences and pleasures in the open. However, this has not stopped the growing market and demand for sex toys from fast gaining ground in Nigeria. This is because more people, especially the young are now more educated, thus enlightened and are more open minded and free to embrace their sexuality.
Simply put, sex toys are man-made instruments designed to enhance human sexual experiences. There are various arguments against the use of sex toys, many of them sexist, self centred, myopic and perhaps parochial. Of the most ridiculous, being that once a woman gets used to using a vibrator, she will have no need for the real thing.

I compare this with our God given legs and their natural ability of movement, taking us from one point to another and the manufacture of cars or various types of transportation also designed to take us from one place to another by man. Now, you have the option of walking to your destination, anytime, anywhere and under any circumstance or simply making things easy, comfortable and pleasurable by taking an appropriate and affordable mode of transportation to your destination. While the choice to either walk or go by transportation remains yours, opting for this instrument for movement does not render your legs useless but assisting your body to perform better and reach your desired destination faster. Nor does acquiring a mode of transportation mean that you will have no need for your legs again or that they will lose the ability to walk. A joke I once read on one of the social media platforms comes to mind.


The conversation was supposedly between a Jamaican Taxi driver and a Muslim male passenger. The man on boarding demanded that the music be turned off because he does not listen to it. He went on to explain that it was a religious injunction because in the time of the great prophet Muhammad (pboh) there was no music or radio. The taxi driver turned off the radio then parked the car a few meters after. He then opened the car door and asked the passenger to get down. Puzzled, he asked the driver what happened and why he was being ushered out of the car. The driver then replied him that, "in the time of the prophet, there were no taxis, so come out of my taxi and wait for a camel". The simple truth is that times have changed and are still changing. The goal is to get to your desired destination (sexual fulfilment/satisfaction), how you get there is your business, so long you are not hurting anyone.

While everything has its merits and demerits, the truth is that sex toys make our sexual efforts easier, faster, more pleasurable and colourful, no matter how uncreative an individual can be. There are several ways sex toys can enhance people's sexual lives as individuals and couples, just as there are many sex toys designed for various parts of the body. As a couple, using sex toys together or alone can help you attain a high level of communication, openness, trust and love for your partner.

Side effects of an orgasm

Written by Sylvester Ikhisemojie
~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, June 10, 2018.

Dr Sylvester Ikhisemojie

In several essays in the past, both on this page and by other writers, the unique nature of sexual release has been studied greatly and explained more. The conclusion has been that sex, particularly when it is satisfactory, is said to do many positive things in the body. Importantly, it is said to be responsible for a sensation of love, of satisfaction and release. Some people are able to sleep better while others are known to feel good both within and without. They seem oblivious to certain physical challenges, namely pain and headache, and therefore maintain a certain spring in their step. However, every coin has two sides just like every story; sometimes, there are even more than two sides. What this means here is that there are certain experiences during and after sex that are very different from any of the facts mentioned above and they are not only surprising but are noteworthy.

Some of these changes in the body are now classified as side effects. Some people especially women; say they experience some intense reactions after having an orgasm. These side effects are described as hallucinations in which many of the women captured in relevant data describe a flying experience which they found quite unnerving. Some others describe a sensation of hurtling through space or of passing through walls into endless corridors resembling underground tunnels. In other situations, some women have described a sensation of experiencing intense headache and even dizziness following an orgasm. Turkey is one country in which some of these responses in women have been most widely studied. Sensationally, men also have described headache and dizziness as two of the most unpleasant side effects they suffer from after an orgasm.

Another side effect first described nearly a century ago, in 1928, is known as orgasmolepsy. It is described in a situation in which there is a sudden loss of muscle power, causing such profound weakness that sleep ensues. This is also found in association with certain sleep disorders like narcolepsy, an uncontrollable desire to fall asleep. The symptoms last for about 30 seconds or less during which there is a complete loss of muscle control following an orgasm. It is a state resembling anaesthesia and the persons are completely helpless in that position.

Crying is another unusual side effect of having an orgasm. It is a constellation of effects after sex in which the persons involved could cry or become tearful, sad or display signs of anxiety. The persons may also become agitated and desperate and some researchers have said that the reality of physical separation so soon after a lot of intimacy may be the trigger because the female partner becomes suddenly lonely. In one study, one in three female university students has reported experiencing some of the above features. These feelings can happen as long as one entire hour after having sex and it often occurs even in stable relationships. It is an alarming experience to see a partner who bursts into tears after intercourse and it is initially difficult to relate it to a side effect as such. This is because there is another group of women who might burst into tears as a result of rape or because they immediately get to regret their sexual experience right after the act. In the former group, an orgasm cannot be possible. In the latter group, while an orgasm might have resulted, the crying results from a feeling of guilt. These are different from a spontaneous cry occurring as a result of the fear of separation after an orgasm has been experienced.