Written by Bunmi Sofola
~Vanguard Nigeria. Friday, February 17, 2017.
AS I bent over Ken, a truncheon in my hand, he looked up at me with a strange sort of longing in his eyes. I kissed him hard on the lips and moved my mouth over his neck and chest. I let him get a good look at me in my American cop uniform before I took off my top and threw it on the floor. I stepped out of my knickers and straddled
him on the bed, kissing him again and stroking his body. And then it happened. I saw him get aroused as I watched. 'Bingo,' I thought, and slipping on protection, he maintained his erection as we had sex. You see George has an intimacy problem. He's in a long-term relationship and madly in love with his girlfriend but he struggles to get an erection during sex. My job is to help him-and other men like him-find their confidence sexually…."
Ashley Grayson is one of a growing number of sexual surrogates all over the world. She is married and what she does is far from prostitution. She continues:"I'm not a prostitute, although I have been called one by people ignorant of my profession. I'm a sex surrogate. I help men with sexual or intimacy problems. I step in for their partner when there's a problem and I coach them through it. I also work with single men who
have sexual anxieties and need help to overcome them. I'm in partnership with a qualified sexual psychologist who holds therapy sessions with clients. There, she will talk to them about their most intimate thoughts, experiences and issues and draw out their insecurities and anxieties. We then work together to devise a 'sexual programme' to help the client overcome his problems.
"And that's where I come in. I work one-on-one with the men over several sessions, sometimes as many as a dozen. We start off very slowly and I usually start by working on eye contact and holding hands. My job is to help the man overcome his problems with intimacy. So he can go back to his partner a confident sexual being. Or, if he's single, he can initiate a sexual relationship and follow through with it, without crippling fear or insecurities stopping him. Sexual therapy of this kind enables the client to discover intimacy as a healing experience, free from the pressures, potential rejection and judgemental attitudes they have experienced in their sexual conditioning.
Afrisonet: Universally African and Socially Responsible. We are on the path to the total discovery of the people in today's Africa. Repositioning, to have a way, a say and to make a difference! Be Part.
Showing posts with label Advisory. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Advisory. Show all posts
How to successfully tame your hostile mother-in-law!
By Okogba
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, February 19, 2017.
DUNNI has been a sort of little brother for years now, and he freely comes to me any time he wants any advice. Not that much was happening in his life, not for a long time at least. An only child, he schooled in Britain and only came home when his mum had a mild stroke and could no longer run the family furniture business. His dad had passed on long before then and he confessed he couldn’t cope. “I’m not the businessman type”, he moaned "the first time he discussed the family business with me. ”I’ve noticed how firmly mum deals with the workers but I don’t really have the bottle. For a start, I know little or nothing about the staff, and for another I can’t really shout when things go wrong. I’m not the aggressive type".
I told him to keep his ears to the ground, look for one or two allies amongst the staff and tap their brain. It seemed to work for a while until one of the ‘allies’ started giving him the eye. Handsome is hardly a word to described Dunni, but he is intelligent and kind. In his early thirties, he could count the number of girlfriends he’s had on the finger. His idea of a wild night was having a good meal at a decent restaurant and topping that up with choice wine. So when he started going out with Fareedah, his mum’s personal assistant, I was happy for him.
When he brought her to the house however, my enthusiasm dipped. The girl was very pretty and extremely extroverted. She was considerably younger. What would she want with drab Dunni when she could have her pick of men? But then, I chided myself, she could have had her heart broken by a few Casanovas and wanted to give Mr. Nice Man a chance.
Dunni admitted he was a bit wary of falling in love with her when we next met. “But she is very "caring, Auntie,” he said. “You know I didn’t have that much experience with dating women, but she’d since taken care of that. The shyness I usually felt when I was near women disappeared when I went out with her the first time and she kissed me, I could hardly contain myself. As a result, our first experience at lovemaking was almost disastrous; I had no confidence because it had been such a long time I was with a woman that it was over almost before it started. But she was patient with me and the next time was better. Now we have the sort of sex I’d only ever dreamt of … ”
When I asked if he’d met any of her friends and family he told me her parents were dead. “I’ve met her friends and they are really nice,” he assured me. “If they thought it was odd her going out with me when she was so pretty and younger, they didn’t show it. Anyway, I’ve changed so much since I met her. She’s overhauled my wardrobe and made me buy a sexier car.
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, February 19, 2017.
DUNNI has been a sort of little brother for years now, and he freely comes to me any time he wants any advice. Not that much was happening in his life, not for a long time at least. An only child, he schooled in Britain and only came home when his mum had a mild stroke and could no longer run the family furniture business. His dad had passed on long before then and he confessed he couldn’t cope. “I’m not the businessman type”, he moaned "the first time he discussed the family business with me. ”I’ve noticed how firmly mum deals with the workers but I don’t really have the bottle. For a start, I know little or nothing about the staff, and for another I can’t really shout when things go wrong. I’m not the aggressive type".
I told him to keep his ears to the ground, look for one or two allies amongst the staff and tap their brain. It seemed to work for a while until one of the ‘allies’ started giving him the eye. Handsome is hardly a word to described Dunni, but he is intelligent and kind. In his early thirties, he could count the number of girlfriends he’s had on the finger. His idea of a wild night was having a good meal at a decent restaurant and topping that up with choice wine. So when he started going out with Fareedah, his mum’s personal assistant, I was happy for him.
When he brought her to the house however, my enthusiasm dipped. The girl was very pretty and extremely extroverted. She was considerably younger. What would she want with drab Dunni when she could have her pick of men? But then, I chided myself, she could have had her heart broken by a few Casanovas and wanted to give Mr. Nice Man a chance.
Dunni admitted he was a bit wary of falling in love with her when we next met. “But she is very "caring, Auntie,” he said. “You know I didn’t have that much experience with dating women, but she’d since taken care of that. The shyness I usually felt when I was near women disappeared when I went out with her the first time and she kissed me, I could hardly contain myself. As a result, our first experience at lovemaking was almost disastrous; I had no confidence because it had been such a long time I was with a woman that it was over almost before it started. But she was patient with me and the next time was better. Now we have the sort of sex I’d only ever dreamt of … ”
When I asked if he’d met any of her friends and family he told me her parents were dead. “I’ve met her friends and they are really nice,” he assured me. “If they thought it was odd her going out with me when she was so pretty and younger, they didn’t show it. Anyway, I’ve changed so much since I met her. She’s overhauled my wardrobe and made me buy a sexier car.
What can hurt your sex life
Written by Funmi Akingbade
Phone: +234 8096762941, +234 8029593116
Phone: +234 8096762941, +234 8029593116
~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, November 6, 2016.
Many of our readers have been sending countless questions to us wanting to know if there are other things that can hurt their sex life apart from bad addictive habits and some common illnesses that have been mentioned on this platform.
Do you know that being mere can hurt a couple's sex life? As simple as being over excited may look or appear, when married couples are not very mindful of this act, they are unknowingly destroying their sex bed. I am sure many of our readers may think this is not so. But do you know that sometimes, when men are overexcited about having sex, they totally forget about the needs of their wives. And what happens is that, during sex, the husband clumsily squeezes the wife's breast.
The point is that during intercourse, the wife is not warmed up and therefore does not enjoy sex as much as the husband. This action hurts couple's sex life and before you know it, the unsatisfied partner is either not showing interest any more or looking for sex elsewhere. So, husbands, go down on your wife like you mean it! If you want her to enjoy sex, then you neted to enjoy performing oral sex on her. Just like nothing is sexier to many husbands than wives giving them a blow job, nothing is sexier to many wives than a husband who enjoys giving oral pleasure. Documentation shows that only about 25 to 30 per cent of married women orgasm or reach climax through sex and most of these women need and likely want clitoral stimulation in addition to sex. I tell men that when you are through, still go down on your wife. You will be surprised to see another side of her, try it tonight. When you roll over after sex and tell her, 'sorry dear, it's just too hot, or I am so tired from office work, or don't worry, next time I will make out time, then you keep a foot of distance between you and her.
Maybe you chat with her a bit before falling asleep. She is noticeable annoyed and it will backfire sooner or later. Even if you are not someone who likes to touch after sex, you just must learn how to. You can start off small and make some kind of physical contact a normal part of your after-sex routine. Scratch her back for a little while and lay a little closer than normal. Once you have scratched her back for a while, move to a closer touch. Cuddling after sex will bring the two of you closer together. One of the most successful marriage relationships has been linked to bonds created after sex and cuddling. According to research, the way you approach your partner after sex is really important to how you approach your relationship in general. When you and your wife barely experience spark after sex, it could hurt your sex life.
 |
| Funmi Akingbade |
Many of our readers have been sending countless questions to us wanting to know if there are other things that can hurt their sex life apart from bad addictive habits and some common illnesses that have been mentioned on this platform.
Do you know that being mere can hurt a couple's sex life? As simple as being over excited may look or appear, when married couples are not very mindful of this act, they are unknowingly destroying their sex bed. I am sure many of our readers may think this is not so. But do you know that sometimes, when men are overexcited about having sex, they totally forget about the needs of their wives. And what happens is that, during sex, the husband clumsily squeezes the wife's breast.
The point is that during intercourse, the wife is not warmed up and therefore does not enjoy sex as much as the husband. This action hurts couple's sex life and before you know it, the unsatisfied partner is either not showing interest any more or looking for sex elsewhere. So, husbands, go down on your wife like you mean it! If you want her to enjoy sex, then you neted to enjoy performing oral sex on her. Just like nothing is sexier to many husbands than wives giving them a blow job, nothing is sexier to many wives than a husband who enjoys giving oral pleasure. Documentation shows that only about 25 to 30 per cent of married women orgasm or reach climax through sex and most of these women need and likely want clitoral stimulation in addition to sex. I tell men that when you are through, still go down on your wife. You will be surprised to see another side of her, try it tonight. When you roll over after sex and tell her, 'sorry dear, it's just too hot, or I am so tired from office work, or don't worry, next time I will make out time, then you keep a foot of distance between you and her.
Maybe you chat with her a bit before falling asleep. She is noticeable annoyed and it will backfire sooner or later. Even if you are not someone who likes to touch after sex, you just must learn how to. You can start off small and make some kind of physical contact a normal part of your after-sex routine. Scratch her back for a little while and lay a little closer than normal. Once you have scratched her back for a while, move to a closer touch. Cuddling after sex will bring the two of you closer together. One of the most successful marriage relationships has been linked to bonds created after sex and cuddling. According to research, the way you approach your partner after sex is really important to how you approach your relationship in general. When you and your wife barely experience spark after sex, it could hurt your sex life.
Ghana, Zambia to adopt Nigeria's BVN scheme
Written by Jonah Nwokpoku
~Vanguard Nigeria. Wednesday, November 9, 2016.
GHANA's apex bank, the Bank of Ghana and Bank of Zambia are currently understudying Nigeria's bank verification number, BVN initiative in order to introduce it into their banking system.
This was disclosed by Director, Banking and Payment System, CBN, Mr. Dipo Fatokun while speaking about the several initiatives the CBN has undertaken to strengthen Nigeria's financial system, at the Swift Business Forum held in Lagos yesterday.
He said: "Under the payment vision 2020, we have actually implemented some reforms. First to be mentioned is the RTGS system. This is one of the systemically important payment infrastructure that we have. And it has assisted in conducting bank transfers and settlements, real time. Another thing that we have done is the bank verification number, which was concluded last year. This has helped a great deal to properly identify bank customers and we are also witnessing drastic reduction of incidence of fraud as a result. And I am glad to say that my colleagues from the Bank of Ghana have visited us, about two weeks ago, to see how this has been done. Our colleagues from the Bank of Zambia are also currently in Nigeria seeing how this was done, with the aim of replicating such in their own country."
Fatokun who was also speaking as a member of a panel discussing, 'Regionalisation and Trade Corridor Evolution in West Africa' pointed out that besides African countries' focus on commodities that offer them comparative advantage and creating incentives to encourage investments, there is need for strong and reliable payment infrastructure to enhance intra-African trade.
Comparative advantage
According to him, "There is need for structural reforms for us to be able to trade successfully within the West African sub region. Each country will specialise on areas where they have comparative advantage. One of the things that has hindered trade between African countries is because most African countries are commodity producers. So, there is need for countries to restructure their economies so that they can also get involved in activities outside the commodity market.
"Another thing that can be done is to create incentives among countries. For example, tax holidays, market instruments, waivers, etc. And there is no doubting the fact that the central bank of these countries and the ministry of finance, the fiscal authorities, will play critical role in the process.
"More so, we must have infrastructure that will connect all the countries so that people can pay seamlessly across different regions of the continent.
If all these are taken care of, then enhanced intra-African trade is doable. And in pursuing this, the government has the responsibility to create awareness because you can only trade in articles that you need.
If citizens are still consumers of foreign products from Europe, America and Asia, then you need to create the necessary market for the African trade. So on our own, we need to begin to educate our people so that we can encourage trade among ourselves."
~Vanguard Nigeria. Wednesday, November 9, 2016.
GHANA's apex bank, the Bank of Ghana and Bank of Zambia are currently understudying Nigeria's bank verification number, BVN initiative in order to introduce it into their banking system.
This was disclosed by Director, Banking and Payment System, CBN, Mr. Dipo Fatokun while speaking about the several initiatives the CBN has undertaken to strengthen Nigeria's financial system, at the Swift Business Forum held in Lagos yesterday.
He said: "Under the payment vision 2020, we have actually implemented some reforms. First to be mentioned is the RTGS system. This is one of the systemically important payment infrastructure that we have. And it has assisted in conducting bank transfers and settlements, real time. Another thing that we have done is the bank verification number, which was concluded last year. This has helped a great deal to properly identify bank customers and we are also witnessing drastic reduction of incidence of fraud as a result. And I am glad to say that my colleagues from the Bank of Ghana have visited us, about two weeks ago, to see how this has been done. Our colleagues from the Bank of Zambia are also currently in Nigeria seeing how this was done, with the aim of replicating such in their own country."
Fatokun who was also speaking as a member of a panel discussing, 'Regionalisation and Trade Corridor Evolution in West Africa' pointed out that besides African countries' focus on commodities that offer them comparative advantage and creating incentives to encourage investments, there is need for strong and reliable payment infrastructure to enhance intra-African trade.
Comparative advantage
According to him, "There is need for structural reforms for us to be able to trade successfully within the West African sub region. Each country will specialise on areas where they have comparative advantage. One of the things that has hindered trade between African countries is because most African countries are commodity producers. So, there is need for countries to restructure their economies so that they can also get involved in activities outside the commodity market.
"Another thing that can be done is to create incentives among countries. For example, tax holidays, market instruments, waivers, etc. And there is no doubting the fact that the central bank of these countries and the ministry of finance, the fiscal authorities, will play critical role in the process.
"More so, we must have infrastructure that will connect all the countries so that people can pay seamlessly across different regions of the continent.
If all these are taken care of, then enhanced intra-African trade is doable. And in pursuing this, the government has the responsibility to create awareness because you can only trade in articles that you need.
If citizens are still consumers of foreign products from Europe, America and Asia, then you need to create the necessary market for the African trade. So on our own, we need to begin to educate our people so that we can encourage trade among ourselves."
How laughter boosts your mental health
Written by Oge Okafor
Email: adelineokonkwo@yahoo.com
~The SUN Nigeria. 30th October 2016.
Laughter is the best medicine, so goes a popular quote, which might be the reason why comedians like Alibaba, Bovi, Basket mouth and others have not only carved a niche for themselves in entertainment but are also smiling to the bank.
When it comes to relieving stress, particularly in times like this in Nigeria where economic recession and political strife seem to be stifling our happiness and existence, more giggles and guffaws are just what the doctor recommends. In order to regain your sanity, have a good laugh. Scientists say it takes about 43 muscles around the face to frown and just 17 to smile. Laughter does you good. Laughter is a great form of stress relief.
Mental health is simply a level of psychological wellbeing or the absence of mental illness. According to World Health organization, WHO, mental health is defined as a state of wellbeing in which every individual realizes his or her potential, copes with the normal stresses of life, works productively and fruitfully and able to make a contribution to the community.
The positive dimension of mental health is stressed in WHO’s definition of health thus: “Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.”
Meanwhile, Mental Health Commission defines good mental health as a sense of wellbeing, confidence and self-esteem. It enables us to fully enjoy and appreciate other people, day-to-day life and our environment. When we are mentally healthy we can form positive relationships, use our abilities to reach our potential and deal with life’s challenges.
Also, the author of Shadows in the mirror – the many faces of depression, Dr Vivian Ikem during the recently commemorated World Mental Health Day stressed the need for public intervention in depression and mental health issues. She stated why it is important to educate people on the need to speak up as well as stop stigmatization of mental patients.
According to her “Nigerians hardly talk about mental health and many think of depression simply as sadness, weakness, weak faith, something that is demon-inflicted or influenced by black magic, something to be ashamed of or as an issue specific to western communities.
Email: adelineokonkwo@yahoo.com
~The SUN Nigeria. 30th October 2016.
Laughter is the best medicine, so goes a popular quote, which might be the reason why comedians like Alibaba, Bovi, Basket mouth and others have not only carved a niche for themselves in entertainment but are also smiling to the bank.When it comes to relieving stress, particularly in times like this in Nigeria where economic recession and political strife seem to be stifling our happiness and existence, more giggles and guffaws are just what the doctor recommends. In order to regain your sanity, have a good laugh. Scientists say it takes about 43 muscles around the face to frown and just 17 to smile. Laughter does you good. Laughter is a great form of stress relief.
Mental health is simply a level of psychological wellbeing or the absence of mental illness. According to World Health organization, WHO, mental health is defined as a state of wellbeing in which every individual realizes his or her potential, copes with the normal stresses of life, works productively and fruitfully and able to make a contribution to the community.
The positive dimension of mental health is stressed in WHO’s definition of health thus: “Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.”
Meanwhile, Mental Health Commission defines good mental health as a sense of wellbeing, confidence and self-esteem. It enables us to fully enjoy and appreciate other people, day-to-day life and our environment. When we are mentally healthy we can form positive relationships, use our abilities to reach our potential and deal with life’s challenges.
Also, the author of Shadows in the mirror – the many faces of depression, Dr Vivian Ikem during the recently commemorated World Mental Health Day stressed the need for public intervention in depression and mental health issues. She stated why it is important to educate people on the need to speak up as well as stop stigmatization of mental patients.
According to her “Nigerians hardly talk about mental health and many think of depression simply as sadness, weakness, weak faith, something that is demon-inflicted or influenced by black magic, something to be ashamed of or as an issue specific to western communities.
Today's Health Matters: Things you must do to prevent heart disease
Topics:
Things you must do to prevent heart disease
Natural remedies for executive stress, metabolic syndrome
Correcting irregular menstruation
________________________________________________
Things you must do to prevent heart disease
Written by Kofo Ogunyankin, Consultant Cardiologist
~Punch Nigeria. Thursday, September 29, 2016.
The World Heart Federation designates every September 29 as the World Heart Day to raise awareness worldwide about heart diseases. This is with a focus on preventing or reducing cardiovascular deaths and stroke.
Current statistics show that heart diseases are responsible for about 17.1 million deaths worldwide every year. This is more than the cumulative global death rate due to cancer, HIV/AIDS and malaria fever.
In Nigeria, there is a significant lack of awareness of the burden imposed on the society by heart diseases and stroke, partly due to a lack of systematic data collection and our pre-occupation with fighting malaria and other communicable diseases.
The theme for the 2016 WHD is 'Power your Life'. This is broken down in to the following actionable components:
Fuel your heart
The food we eat and the calories in our drinks provide the fuel for our body. Overeating is a big problem worldwide and Nigerians are not spared from the obesity epidemic. Unfortunately, most people who are overweight are in denial of the role they have personally played through their eating and drinking habits.
When confronted about weight gain, the common excuses that the average Nigerian often gives include "I have heavy bones", "I eat less food than a child", "I eat only once a day" and so on. There is no doubt that there are genetically determined reasons for differences between individuals in how much weight that is gained from a given calorie intake.
However, if each person determines to eat only what is needed to live and no more, weight loss will occur. As the saying goes, you should 'eat to live and not live to eat'. I advise my patients to think of whatever they consume (food or drink) as a bank deposit and their weight as the monthly account balance.
Eating well is not complicated. The basic tenet is for each individual to make an effort to control what they eat. This might mean taking your lunch to work if the only choices available at work are not heart-friendly.
Things you must do to prevent heart disease
Natural remedies for executive stress, metabolic syndrome
Correcting irregular menstruation
________________________________________________
Things you must do to prevent heart disease
Written by Kofo Ogunyankin, Consultant Cardiologist
~Punch Nigeria. Thursday, September 29, 2016.
 |
| Kofo Ogunyankin |
Current statistics show that heart diseases are responsible for about 17.1 million deaths worldwide every year. This is more than the cumulative global death rate due to cancer, HIV/AIDS and malaria fever.
In Nigeria, there is a significant lack of awareness of the burden imposed on the society by heart diseases and stroke, partly due to a lack of systematic data collection and our pre-occupation with fighting malaria and other communicable diseases.
The theme for the 2016 WHD is 'Power your Life'. This is broken down in to the following actionable components:
Fuel your heart
The food we eat and the calories in our drinks provide the fuel for our body. Overeating is a big problem worldwide and Nigerians are not spared from the obesity epidemic. Unfortunately, most people who are overweight are in denial of the role they have personally played through their eating and drinking habits.
When confronted about weight gain, the common excuses that the average Nigerian often gives include "I have heavy bones", "I eat less food than a child", "I eat only once a day" and so on. There is no doubt that there are genetically determined reasons for differences between individuals in how much weight that is gained from a given calorie intake.
However, if each person determines to eat only what is needed to live and no more, weight loss will occur. As the saying goes, you should 'eat to live and not live to eat'. I advise my patients to think of whatever they consume (food or drink) as a bank deposit and their weight as the monthly account balance.
Eating well is not complicated. The basic tenet is for each individual to make an effort to control what they eat. This might mean taking your lunch to work if the only choices available at work are not heart-friendly.
Why sugar could be eight times more addictive than cocaine!
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, September 18, 2016.
DOES the thought of living life sugar-free fill you with horror? If so, you may unknowingly be addicted. In fact, sugar is believed to be eight times more addictive than cocaine. Some people are more sensitive than others, but the more sugar you eat, the more likely it has taken hold of your addictive pathways and is driving you to eat – and drink – far too much.
When sugar hits the bloodstream, it stimulates release of a brain chemical called dopamine, which makes you feel good. The feeling is usually short-lived. By the time you're licking the chocolate off your fingertips or picking the last crumbs of biscuit from the plate, your dopamine levels will probably have fallen, taking you into a mini-withdrawal. This can trigger cravings for more sugar, urging you, against your better judgement, to pick up another biscuit or break off another square of chocolate so your brain can have another hit of dopamine. Before long, the biological signals that would normally control hunger and satiety (fullness) are swiftly being overwhelmed by this dopamine stimulation, to the point where your body (and brain) starts listening only to sugar's cues and ignores the fact that you have already eaten far more than you need.
If you have even the mildest addiction to sugar, there is every chance that your 'off' switch no longer works properly in response to eating, either. That's why one biscuit or scoop of ice-cream never seems like enough, even after a huge meal. The more sugar you eat, the more your tolerance adapts, so you end up needing more and more sugar to get the same boost – drug addicts and alcoholics experience the same cycle.
QUIZ: ARE YOU A SUGAR ADDICT?
ANSWER honestly yes or no to the following questions …
*CAN YOU eat sweet, starchy or fatty foods until you are over- full?
*DO YOU feel hungry even after eating a full meal
*CAN YOU eat large quantities of sweets or stodgy foods even when you're not feeling particularly hungry?
DOES the thought of living life sugar-free fill you with horror? If so, you may unknowingly be addicted. In fact, sugar is believed to be eight times more addictive than cocaine. Some people are more sensitive than others, but the more sugar you eat, the more likely it has taken hold of your addictive pathways and is driving you to eat – and drink – far too much.
When sugar hits the bloodstream, it stimulates release of a brain chemical called dopamine, which makes you feel good. The feeling is usually short-lived. By the time you're licking the chocolate off your fingertips or picking the last crumbs of biscuit from the plate, your dopamine levels will probably have fallen, taking you into a mini-withdrawal. This can trigger cravings for more sugar, urging you, against your better judgement, to pick up another biscuit or break off another square of chocolate so your brain can have another hit of dopamine. Before long, the biological signals that would normally control hunger and satiety (fullness) are swiftly being overwhelmed by this dopamine stimulation, to the point where your body (and brain) starts listening only to sugar's cues and ignores the fact that you have already eaten far more than you need.
If you have even the mildest addiction to sugar, there is every chance that your 'off' switch no longer works properly in response to eating, either. That's why one biscuit or scoop of ice-cream never seems like enough, even after a huge meal. The more sugar you eat, the more your tolerance adapts, so you end up needing more and more sugar to get the same boost – drug addicts and alcoholics experience the same cycle.
QUIZ: ARE YOU A SUGAR ADDICT?
ANSWER honestly yes or no to the following questions …
*CAN YOU eat sweet, starchy or fatty foods until you are over- full?
*DO YOU feel hungry even after eating a full meal
*CAN YOU eat large quantities of sweets or stodgy foods even when you're not feeling particularly hungry?
How to be an authority in your field
Written by Azuka Onwuka
~Punch Nigeria. Tuesday, August 9, 2016.
"A little learning is a dangerous thing;
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring" - Alexander Pope
Knowledge is critical to success in life. High flyers never get weary of learning. They never believe that they know enough. Therefore, they try to learn at every opportunity. Even as wise as he is known to be, Socrates is reputed to have said: "The only I know is that I know nothing."
They do not want to talk or operate from the standpoint of ignorance. So, they develop a voracious and undiscriminating appetite for information.
The result is that they are soon seen as authorities to be consulted in their field. The reason is that many people are too lazy to scratch beyond the surface. For example, even with an Internet-enabled phone, many people will prefer to call someone or send a message asking for the simplest of information that Google can supply in a second. Most people tend to assume that the so-called authorities know more than they actually do. And when a person is constantly consulted in his area of business, he will definitely succeed more and make more money.
Some people erroneously think that being an authority in a field is such a difficult matter. They think that they may never know much to be listened to in a particular field of knowledge. But everybody can become an "authority" by making a little effort.
Two experiences made me believe that once a person is determined, it does not take much effort and time to cross over from the sea of ignorance to the spring of knowledge. About a year before the 1994 World Cup in USA, I was not very knowledgeable in football technicalities. I loved football very well like most young Nigerian men, but I could not talk with any certainty who played what position in a match. I also knew little outside the Nigerian league. My condition was not helped too by the fact that I was outside Lagos before 1994, where I did not have access to much information as Lagos provides.
~Punch Nigeria. Tuesday, August 9, 2016.
"A little learning is a dangerous thing;
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring" - Alexander Pope
 |
| Azuka Onwuka |
They do not want to talk or operate from the standpoint of ignorance. So, they develop a voracious and undiscriminating appetite for information.
The result is that they are soon seen as authorities to be consulted in their field. The reason is that many people are too lazy to scratch beyond the surface. For example, even with an Internet-enabled phone, many people will prefer to call someone or send a message asking for the simplest of information that Google can supply in a second. Most people tend to assume that the so-called authorities know more than they actually do. And when a person is constantly consulted in his area of business, he will definitely succeed more and make more money.
Some people erroneously think that being an authority in a field is such a difficult matter. They think that they may never know much to be listened to in a particular field of knowledge. But everybody can become an "authority" by making a little effort.
Two experiences made me believe that once a person is determined, it does not take much effort and time to cross over from the sea of ignorance to the spring of knowledge. About a year before the 1994 World Cup in USA, I was not very knowledgeable in football technicalities. I loved football very well like most young Nigerian men, but I could not talk with any certainty who played what position in a match. I also knew little outside the Nigerian league. My condition was not helped too by the fact that I was outside Lagos before 1994, where I did not have access to much information as Lagos provides.
Five things to avoid when chatting up someone
AfriMobile
~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, July 31, 2016
Communication between two strangers can be hard. Make them both of different genders and you have the world's oldest mystery on your hands. Contrary to what our parents said, it's not one of those things you get better at by being a good boy and reading your books. In fact, it seems to get worse the smarter you are.
Have you missed out on an opportunity to get to know someone because you were tongue tied? Well hopefully this will happen never again. The next time you want to walk up to someone, here are five things that you should avoid.
PS: Ladies, don't leave the challenge to the men, you can use them too.
1) Having Nothing To Say :
Impulse is not always bad and sometimes there's no time. But the last thing you want to do is hold her up and not be able to string together a coherent sentence. You might still get her number out of pity but is that really a first impression you'd like to leave? Whether it's a compliment or a joke, have at least one sentence ready.
2) Using Clichés:
'I think I've seen you somewhere before' or 'You must have fallen from heaven'. Unless you are absolutely sure this is true, no one wants to hear these clichés that have been around since 1000B.C. It immediately makes people distrust you and raise their walls even higher. Your best bet is honesty. Simple sentences that say exactly what you mean, devoid of Shakespearean phrases will always go down well.
3) Being Dishonest:
~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, July 31, 2016
Communication between two strangers can be hard. Make them both of different genders and you have the world's oldest mystery on your hands. Contrary to what our parents said, it's not one of those things you get better at by being a good boy and reading your books. In fact, it seems to get worse the smarter you are.Have you missed out on an opportunity to get to know someone because you were tongue tied? Well hopefully this will happen never again. The next time you want to walk up to someone, here are five things that you should avoid.
PS: Ladies, don't leave the challenge to the men, you can use them too.
1) Having Nothing To Say :
Impulse is not always bad and sometimes there's no time. But the last thing you want to do is hold her up and not be able to string together a coherent sentence. You might still get her number out of pity but is that really a first impression you'd like to leave? Whether it's a compliment or a joke, have at least one sentence ready.
2) Using Clichés:
'I think I've seen you somewhere before' or 'You must have fallen from heaven'. Unless you are absolutely sure this is true, no one wants to hear these clichés that have been around since 1000B.C. It immediately makes people distrust you and raise their walls even higher. Your best bet is honesty. Simple sentences that say exactly what you mean, devoid of Shakespearean phrases will always go down well.
3) Being Dishonest:
Watch out for this suspected ATM fraudster, EFCC warns Nigerians
~PUNCH NIGERIA. Tuesday, July 19, 2016.
The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission has raised the alarm about the activities of identity thieves and automated teller machine fraudsters in the country.
It has also urged Nigerians to be more careful when carrying out transactions via ATMs and to avoid disclosing their Personal Identification Numbers to others.
In a post on its Facebook page, the anti-graft agency drew attention to the activity of one suspected ATM fraudster, who goes by the name Akinade Tofunmi.
The EFCC, which has released images of the suspect, is seeking the cooperation and support of Nigerians to capture her and prevent her from defrauding more people.
The suspected scammer, who is being trailed by the Ibadan Zonal Office of the EFCC, is into identity theft and lurks around the ATMs and Point of Sale machines.
According to the EFFC, Tofunmi, operates late in the night when all bank transactions had closed and preferably over the weekend when her prospective victims may not be able to alert the banks for any unauthorised transaction.
Common poisons in the home
Written by Dr. Sylvester Ikhisemojie
~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, July 17, 2016
Poisons, such as the ones discussed below, would be harmful to people of all age groups. However, the key difference why we shall place more emphasis on the effects on children than on adults is because while children are likely to have consumed the substances in error, adults are more likely to have taken such compounds deliberately, as mostly is the case in suicide attempts.
Children, especially toddlers, are so prone to accidental consumption of the various compounds mentioned that it is important for all parents and care givers to be aware of the dangers. As a result, people must have the presence of mind to keep all these substances safely away, far from the easy reach of children and stored in secure containers that are child and tamper-proof. These measures will keep most children out of harm's way except for the most obstinate ones. Here, as in other topics we have previously discussed on this page, prevention is better than cure and much easier to bring about if you try her enough.
Poverty is a choice
~The Pinch, Nigeria. Wednesday, June 15, 2016
Author of 'Practical steps to financial independence and personal finance coach', Usiere Uko, writes on raising children to be financially independent
This statement seems harsh and cruel but sadly it is the truth. We are a product of our dominant thoughts. The common saying 'As a man thinks in his heart, so is he' is from the book of Proverbs 23: 7 (NKJV)'. Our decisions create our circumstances. Our financial decisions create our financial circumstances, as in other areas of life – social, professional, heath, spiritual, etc. If you want to know who is to blame for where you are now, look for the closest mirror.
George Bernard Shaw drives the point home succinctly with his famous quote: "People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them."
It takes a level of maturity and willingness to learn to accept this fact. We are so used to blaming others that we hardly take time to really look at what we are doing wrong.
Nobody can change you
As I counsel people, I often come against a brick wall of excuses. One of the toughest cases I have had to deal with is my gateman. Counselling him is like to talking to a brick wall. He always has a readymade excuse why what I am saying will not work. He has approached me severally for a salary advance for expenditure that will not improve his finances. At each instance, I sit him down to try to talk some sense into him rather than refuse him. When he wanted to buy a motorcycle because he was tired of trekking to work, I warned him that he was acquiring a liability and increasing his overhead. My suggestion that if he must buy the motorcycle, he can use it as 'okada' when he is off duty in the evenings fell on deaf ears.
Author of 'Practical steps to financial independence and personal finance coach', Usiere Uko, writes on raising children to be financially independent
This statement seems harsh and cruel but sadly it is the truth. We are a product of our dominant thoughts. The common saying 'As a man thinks in his heart, so is he' is from the book of Proverbs 23: 7 (NKJV)'. Our decisions create our circumstances. Our financial decisions create our financial circumstances, as in other areas of life – social, professional, heath, spiritual, etc. If you want to know who is to blame for where you are now, look for the closest mirror.
George Bernard Shaw drives the point home succinctly with his famous quote: "People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them."
It takes a level of maturity and willingness to learn to accept this fact. We are so used to blaming others that we hardly take time to really look at what we are doing wrong.
Nobody can change you
As I counsel people, I often come against a brick wall of excuses. One of the toughest cases I have had to deal with is my gateman. Counselling him is like to talking to a brick wall. He always has a readymade excuse why what I am saying will not work. He has approached me severally for a salary advance for expenditure that will not improve his finances. At each instance, I sit him down to try to talk some sense into him rather than refuse him. When he wanted to buy a motorcycle because he was tired of trekking to work, I warned him that he was acquiring a liability and increasing his overhead. My suggestion that if he must buy the motorcycle, he can use it as 'okada' when he is off duty in the evenings fell on deaf ears.
Spanking can harm your child's mental health
Written by Bukola Adebayo
~Punch, Nigeria. Friday, May 6, 2016
Agreed that a verse of the Bible says, "Spare the rod and spoil the child". And it will be wrong to disobey instructions from above. However, the Holy Book does not say you should use the rod to harm the child.
Many parents, caregivers and guardians use the rod to harm children in an attempt to 'discipline' them. Such incidents bring up the moral and logical question on the role of the rod in parenting.
Science may have provided some insights and answers to the puzzle. After collecting and evaluating the results of a 50-year-old study, researchers announced the troubling and yet enlightening result of spanking in kids, either for correctional or punitive purposes.
The study, published in this month's Journal of Family Psychology, reveals that the more children are spanked, the more likely they are to defy their parents; experience anti-social behaviour; express aggression, suffer mental health problems and cognitive difficulties.
The scientists evaluated the research which involved over 160,000 children across the globe.
The lead researcher and associate professor of human development and family sciences at the University of Texas at Austin, Elizabeth Gershoff, described the result as the most accurate and evidence-based analysis that has showed the effects of spanking alone in many years.
Gershoff says, "Our analysis found that spanking was associated with unintended detrimental outcomes and was not associated with more immediate or long-term compliance, which are parents' intended outcomes when they discipline their children."
Scholar and co-author Andrew Grogan-Kaylor links spanking with 13 of the17 negative outcomes in children and adults.
"The upshot of the study is that spanking increases the likelihood of a wide variety of undesired outcomes in children. Spanking thus does the opposite of what parents usually want it to do," Grogan-Kaylor says.
~Punch, Nigeria. Friday, May 6, 2016
Agreed that a verse of the Bible says, "Spare the rod and spoil the child". And it will be wrong to disobey instructions from above. However, the Holy Book does not say you should use the rod to harm the child.Many parents, caregivers and guardians use the rod to harm children in an attempt to 'discipline' them. Such incidents bring up the moral and logical question on the role of the rod in parenting.
Science may have provided some insights and answers to the puzzle. After collecting and evaluating the results of a 50-year-old study, researchers announced the troubling and yet enlightening result of spanking in kids, either for correctional or punitive purposes.
The study, published in this month's Journal of Family Psychology, reveals that the more children are spanked, the more likely they are to defy their parents; experience anti-social behaviour; express aggression, suffer mental health problems and cognitive difficulties.
The scientists evaluated the research which involved over 160,000 children across the globe.
The lead researcher and associate professor of human development and family sciences at the University of Texas at Austin, Elizabeth Gershoff, described the result as the most accurate and evidence-based analysis that has showed the effects of spanking alone in many years.
Gershoff says, "Our analysis found that spanking was associated with unintended detrimental outcomes and was not associated with more immediate or long-term compliance, which are parents' intended outcomes when they discipline their children."
Scholar and co-author Andrew Grogan-Kaylor links spanking with 13 of the17 negative outcomes in children and adults.
"The upshot of the study is that spanking increases the likelihood of a wide variety of undesired outcomes in children. Spanking thus does the opposite of what parents usually want it to do," Grogan-Kaylor says.
Tips for dating a Nigerian woman
By Femi Ajasa
~Vanguard: Wednesday, April 13, 2016
Dating a typical Nigerian lady can be a topsy-turvy experience especially for a man who is just wetting his feet in the dating game. Normally, women are complicated beings let alone a Nigerian woman who has so many challenges to deal with like an unstable economy, family, tradition, ethnicity, religion, peer pressure, biology and much more. All these factors conspire to influence whoever she will date.
The averageman with his chauvinistic African mindset or perception does not understand this and expect this type of woman to accept him hook, line and sinker. Little does he know that the days of parents marrying wives for their kids isold skooland that most women know what they want. If you want your relationship to blossom with a typical Nigerian woman, Jovago.com, Africa's shares tips that can make this dream a reality.
Give her money to make her hair
Didi,Shooku, andPatewoare traditional hairstyles in Nigeria but young women prefer the Brazilian hair, the deft Ghana weaving, and attachment because it makes them appear sophisticated. They rarely wear their natural hair, adorning these foreign hairstyles cost money and time and she expects her man to foot the bill for her hair. If not always but once in awhile. In other cases, if you notice she is wearing a new hairstyle, it will not kill you to compliment her and perhaps pay for it. Afterwards, it is because of you, she spends that much time at the salon anyways.
Avoid quarrels in your relationship
~Punch, Nigeria. Sunday, March 13, 2016
Every couple desires a happy relationship. Don't let misunderstandings ruin your bond.Follow these steps and let your relationship thrive
Identify the source
If you always quarrel in your relationship, you need to figure out where it is coming from. If the source is outside the relationship, don't treat it like a relationship problem. Money issues account for more relationship problems than any other source. But in reality, money is a financial problem. It only becomes a relationship problem if you let it.
Don't assign blame
The goal of a relationship is to draw a couple closer, not to alienate your best friend and life partner. Blaming your partner could be very destructive to a relationship and it never contributes to unity. The same goes for being critical of one another, all that will do is divide the relationship.
Acknowledge your partner's concerns
If something goes wrong and you feel responsible, it is easy to turn defensive when your partner expresses their concerns. Rather than turning it into a confrontation by defending yourself, put your ego aside and acknowledge his or her concerns with an understanding heart. You are in the relationship together and that means you probably have similar concerns that you need to work on.
Don't make wrong assumptions
If something happens that you are not sure of, don't make things worse by assuming. Instead of focusing on the negativities, sit down with your mate and discuss possible solutions. If you work together in a creative way you may be able to turn any brewing quarrel around.
Don't rely entirely on Google
Written by Sola Fagorusi
Punch, Tuesday, March 8, 2016
Fatima dislocated her left shoulder while getting dressed. She was in an excruciating pain, butnot enough pain to make her forget that her immediate condition would be embarrassing to people if she were to raise the alarm.
She took her phone, which was lying on her bed and quickly used her right hand to quickly type "how to fix a dislocated shoulder" on her Google search bar, and followed the instructions. She was able to solve her problem without any embarrassment. She went for a check-up after getting dressed to ensure that every part of her body was in good position.
Google has become a part of our lives, and has seen us through minute-to-minute aspect of our daily living. People solve many of their problems with Google. They have improved cooking, housekeeping, grooming skills and many other skills with Google.
As an advanced kind of dictionary, Google not only defines words, it also explains things. It gives detailed examples, numerous views and puts things in context. These days, many arguments end as soon as they begin, as people easily turn to Google for clarification. "Let's Google it" is one of the most popular phrases all over the world nowadays.
One can use Google maps not only to find locations, but also to find distances and decide whether a trip is worth it or not. Google can also be in use to research on every aspect an entire trip.
It has saved a lot of businesses and relationships and contributed in making the world even smaller. Again, language is no longer a barrier, as we have Google translate.
It is becoming increasingly difficult to cheat in business because we can always check things on Google; even the prospective business partner's past. With Google converter, everybody has the exact and relevant details at any time.
Of course, with all great things that help people immensely, the possibility of great harm to people is also great.
Sexual erotic triggers
Written by Funmi Akingbade
~Punch, Nigeria. Saturday, March 5, 2016
Couples do not know that almost every part of their bodies is an erotic trigger region. Many times, husbands come to me and bitterly complain that they are not enjoying the best of their wives sexually. A man will say because the woman is circumcised, pregnant, nursing a baby, undergoing menopause or fed up with the same old ways they have been making love, hence she is not fully involved anymore.
One thing is basic, there are high sexually sensitive areas and there are lower sexual sensitive areas but when couples concentrate only on the high sensitive areas, they tend to run out of techniques sooner than they wish, but when they interplay the high and low sexual zones intermittently, there is a possibility of newness and excitement at all times. Now, the most basic sexual trigger of most wives that many husbands play with are the breast and the clitoris, all because these organs are prominent and easily accessible. This is also because blood rushes to these areas especially when the woman is turned on, and also because the stimulation of the clitoris triggers the hood of her clitoris. The hood of the clitoris is the fold of skin that surrounds and protects the clitoral glans. Since it is less sensitive, many husbands ignore it but amazingly, this hood can handle both gentle squeezes that get her ready to be on heat without even touching the clitoris itself.
Essentially also, the pubic mound is a good place to add some variety to your thinking selection. Try this trick; take your fingertip into a firm point, and trail it around the mound. Since you usually focus on the top three quarters of her vaginal area, she'll be surprised and aroused because beneath the arena you are trailing your fingers on is packed full of sensory nerves.
Also think of her clitoris like the head of your penis, her clitoris is jam-packed with millions of nerve endings, as is the tip of your penis. However, if the head of your penis can take a bit more pressure- the nerves are spread over a slightly larger area- her clitoris is more sensitive. This spot is filled with nerves, so it needs to be stimulated carefully. Tease the areas around it first, and then make your way to it, building up speed as you go. But finger with caution: if you spend too much time there or are too rough, too soon, she may become overstimulated, and that can be really painful for her. To keep that from happening, switch your tactics. Don't stick with one for more than 10 seconds or so.
One Word That Can End A Friendship
~TheGuardian, Nigerian.
We all have friends and we all know how important it is to have friends for the various reasons that we do; be it for reasons like networking, social life or for the sake of having a life partner. Yes, sometimes they support, encourage and stick with us through thick or thin but there is one major thing that can turn a good and lively friendship into a sour tale of strangers. Can you guess it? it has the following meaning:- to be actively and attentively engaged in work or a pastime
- not at leisure; otherwise engaged
"I'd love to hang out! But I'm really busy."
"Sorry I didn't get back to you earlier! I've been so busy."
"What's going on with me? Just busy as usual!"
Truthfully, there is nothing wrong in being busy, people can actually have a ton of things to do and still maintain a great relationship. It's not the work that is bothering, it's the word "busy". The word busy makes the other person feel like there is something more important at that present time to do than engaging in the activity in which they would like to do with you,indirectly letting the person know their place in your social scale of preference.
Let's see some other alternatives to telling someone you are "busy":
- Telling them the actual reason you can't meet with them
What women want from their men -Funke Felix-Adejumo
Written by CHRISTY ANYANWU - Nigeria.
 |
| Rev (Mrs.) Funke Felix-Adejumo |
Renowned international speaker and female empowerment coach, Rev (Mrs.) Funke Felix-Adejumo, spoke on the challenges of womanhood and her experience as a wife for over 30 years.
Excerpts:
You have been married to one man for over 30 years. What has kept you going?
My husband and I have actually been married for 31years. Our marriage will be 32 on September 8. The major and greatest force in our marriage is God. And that's not to sound religious. It is what God keeps that is kept. John 3:27 is my favorite Scripture: "A man can receive nothing except it be given him from heaven."
God did not create a world in which He will not be needed. He instituted marriage in the first instance. So He is the greatest marriage expert and consultant.
Both of us are born again Christians so we don't joke with our relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. This reflects in the way we love and honour each other. It reflects in the way we handle misunderstandings. It reflects in everything we do.
In 31 years, my husband and I pray together everyday! When we are not together, we pray on the phone. Remember we did not start traveling separately until a few years ago. That was before technology came into the picture.
Also, we agreed on transparency and honesty. We agreed that this will be the trade mark of our relationship. There's nothing we don't discuss. And I mean absolutely nothing, including the minutest details of life.
How to overcome embarrassment
~TheGuardian, Nigeria.
When you are in an in the midst of an embarrassing moment, you can imagine that you are the only person on earth and hope that the earth opens up and swallows you so that you may escape the mixed emotions that you would be experiencing. Everyone gets embarrassed and so it isn't something to be disturbed about, because it actually serves a purpose. It helps one discover who you can trust and build further relationship with. It can be a bridge to connect you to other if you handle it well. One of the things that you could do is take it in stride.
Laugh:
You are not Dangote. You can laugh it off. Several research indicate that laughter is as good as medicine. It is a smart way to overcome anxiety. Laugh at yourself and the situation that incites the feelings of embarrassment. It gives room for others to laugh with you instead of at you. It can be an icebreaker and help you meet and make new friends.
Be honest about how you feel:
Say out loud, 'this is so embarrassing’. Embrace and own the moment. Share the moment with the witnesses to the embarrassing moment. Talk about it. Smile and let it go. Don't rehearse it and don't replay it in your mind. It happened and you are choosing to move on from that point.
Explain:
If you farted for example, you can explain how that you had eggs at dinner or at breakfast before going to work/school and why you think it happened. Be understanding and kind to yourself.
Ask for help and appreciate it when offered:
If you spilled coffee over your shirt, collect the paper napkins that are passed to you and say thank you. If you fell, receive assistance from whomever is helping you up. Be vocal about the thanks, don't murmur, it will help distract you from the embarrassing incident.
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