Lecturer impregnated me, rejects pregnancy, says nursing student • It wasn't me, I used condom - Lecturer

Written by Samson Folarin
~Punch Nigeria. Monday, May 22, 2017.

A lecturer at the Ogun State College of Health Technology, Ilese Ijebu, Dr Oluseyi Adu, and a Dental Nursing student, Mosunmola, are embroiled in a row over who is responsible for the pregnancy that the nursing student is carrying.

Mosunmola, who is nine months pregnant, alleged that Adu was responsible for the child in her womb, adding that they had sex in a hotel sometime in August, 2016.

READ:

45-year-old man impregnates pupil, insists they are lovers

She said the lecturer beat her up last month when she confronted him at the college for avoiding her, adding that the case was already at the Ilese Police Station.

However, while Adu admitted to having sex with the 28-year-old, he insisted that he used contraceptive, saying the lady seduced him and he gave in to the temptation.

Mosunmola told our correspondent that she underwent a three-year course at the college, adding that several lecturers had asked her out before Adu, but she refused.

She said, "Dr Adu is the Oral Health Coordinator for the college. During my three years study, he taught me two courses each semester. I have never failed his course.

"When I got to second semester, 300 level, he awarded me 38 in one of his courses. I went to his office in August 2016 to know why I failed the course. I needed to pass all my courses to be able to go for my board exam.

"He asked me if I thought I could just come to the school and go like that. He said if I dated him, he would waive the course. He said he didn't approach me in 100 level because another lecturer was interested in dating me.

"The lecturer he mentioned told me in 100 level that it was either I paid him money or used my body to pass his course. Because I didn't agree, I failed his course. I didn't pass it until I got to 300 level.

"I told Adu that I would date him, but I didn't want to have any problem, and he assured me that there would be no regret."

The victim said the lecturer took her to the office of the Head of Department and after some discussions, it was agreed that she could sit for the board exam.

After the board exam at POGIL College of Health Technology, Oke-Eri, Ijebu Ode, on August 21, Adu, who was among those on the panel, was said to have given Mosunmola some of his practical instruments and a laptop for safekeeping.

However, Mosunmola said when the school bus arrived to take the students back to the school, she forgot to give the practical instruments back to the lecturer.

She said Adu later called and asked her to bring the instruments to a hotel where he lodged.

"I was preparing to leave when he called me back that I would be sleeping over with him.

"I met him with another lecturer in my department. I observed that the lecturer also had a female student with him. From the hotel, we went to different places before we finally lodged in another hotel along Ilese Road. While I was with Adu in a room, my other classmate passed the night with the second lecturer in another room.

How to handle a cheating spouse

Written by MOTUNRAYO JOEL 
~Punch Nigeria. Monday, April 10, 2017. 

On June 4, 2015, Mrs. Bukola Yusuf (not real name), a mother of three stormed out of her house in shorts, "I was prepared to engage in a fight with the woman who 'stole' my husband's heart," she told our correspondent.

She said she was fed up with the woman who constantly called and sent messages to her husband's phone.

Yusuf said, "At midnight, my husband's phone would ring; whenever I confronted him about it, he would say, 'It is a useless woman disturbing my phone.' I believed him because I trusted him."

When she discovered that the lady disturbing her peace lived two streets away from hers, she became furious.

"That day-June 4, I was ready to fight; to put an end to everything. But my neighbours stopped me from storming the lady's house," she said.

Little did Yusuf know that her husband was having an affair with the lady. She didn't suspect because he promised her he would never cheat on her. He constantly reassured her of his undying love for her, and like every 'good' wife, she believed him.

"My husband does not have only one girlfriend, I heard he has several girlfriends. I almost lost my mind the period I discovered about his cheating lifestyle. I would cry for days; I felt worthless. He couldn't hold his emotions one night; he blatantly told me that he loves the woman that had been calling his phone. He confessed and said that they met some months ago and that he had been hiding it from me because he didn't want to hurt my feelings," she said.

Yusuf told SUNDAY PUNCH that her husband shares his time between her and his girlfriends.

Yusuf isn't the only one battling with a cheating spouse; Mrs. Toyin Oyebanjo (not real name) is paddling the same boat.

Oyebanjo believes her husband's 'womanising' nature started before they got married. She said she thought he would change.

"I have been married to him for 15 years; we separated for two years. It breaks my heart to say that I've not been happy in my marriage since I got married. People may say I was stupid for marrying him, knowing quite well that he can't remain with one woman. But I thought he would change; I thought his love for me would change him,'' she said.

The son who helped his dad make a baby!

By Urowayino Warami   
~vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, April 2, 2017

TUNDE had been separated from his wife for years. She lives abroad and they are good friends. After years of enjoying the single life, he eventually fell in love and things started going horribly wrong. His story:

"I am a medical doctor with a thriving private practice. Six years ago, I finally plucked up enough courage to ask Maureen out to lunch. She was a junior manager at the bank the hospital used and was always very friendly. Whenever interest rates on fixed deposits went up, she would advise me to push for the highest possible on our account. A professional to the core, I was very impressed with how brilliant and intelligent she was. Not to mention her smashing figure.

"She'd just helped push a soft loan I desperately needed to refurbish the hospital when I asked her to lunch as a 'thank you' gesture. To my pleasant surprise, she agreed and that was how our relationship started. I was in my fifties with two lovely children. Their mother had opted to stay behind when I wanted to relocate to the country – our marriage wasn't working and she had a job she loved with the social service. So, we parted amicably and I so much enjoyed my freedom, I wasn't really keen on getting married again- until I met Maureen.

She was a single mother of a two-year-old daughter and as I got to know her better, she told me she was thinking of leaving the bank to pursue a business in horticulture. She'd completed a horticultural course when she studied abroad and had done a bit on the side for a few clients who'd praised her efforts. I encouraged her to follow her dreams and gave her financial support to kick-start the business – she already had half of the outlay from her retirement benefits.


"Barely a year later, the business had taken off beyond our wildest dreams – thanks to elaborate decorations that are the in-thing at functions these days – weddings especially. With my clout, I was able to get her jobs from reputable companies and friends.

"It was around this time we gave a serious thought to getting married. One thing we both wanted very much was a baby of our own. For the next three years, we tried but nothing happened. In the end, I took her to a gynaecologist who was also a very good friend. He did tests upon tests until it was discovered that only one of her fallopian tubes was functioning. That, coupled with my age, had reduced our chances of having a baby. My friend then suggested we travel to Britain, giving us the address of a top IVF hospital. At first, I was reluctant, but Maureen was in her early 30s and feared her biological clock was ticking fast. And I loved her. So I agreed to go with her.

Wanna kill yourself? A Suicide Awareness!

Sent by Nwachukwu Nwabufo
~ Nigeria. March 23, 2017

# SuicideAwareness 

Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the
letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready.

You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mommy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” 
Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying. The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. 


Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything.

For decades mum hid the fact she was a mistress!

Written by Bunmi Sofola
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, March 5, 2017.

LOLA didn't know the real truth about her mum's marriage of over 30 years until her dad died a few years ago. "I'd had my suspicion about the relationship between my parents. Whilst a few relatives made snide remarks about the illegitimacy of their union, my mother assured us that though our father was once married, he got divorced before they tied the knot.

We somewhat believed her because our half-siblings from our dad's first marriage visited regularly." Lola told me, still bewildered at the events that unfolded just after her dad's passing. "We had what you would call a week-end dad. He worked away in one of the states and only came home weekends. At least, that's what we were made to understand. But he was a pleasant enough dad and picked up all our bills.

"I was an undergraduate when a new friend became curious and wanted to know if my father was the same one her family knew by the same name on their street. I said he was. Is your mum's name Fadeke?", she asked, puzzled. "No. She's Maureen." She looked a bit embarrassed and when next I got home, I asked mum if she knew anyone called Fadeke. 'She's your dad's first wife but they're divorced now', she said. I was really curious.

'So what type of wedding did you have?' I wanted to know. She'd never shown us any photographs. It was a simple registry wedding', she breezed. 'We just had close friends as witnesses.' So where were the photographs? `When the house was flooded years back, the few wedding photographs we had were among the ones destroyed,' she said offhand, not quite meeting my eyes. By the time I finished at the university, our dad's visit had dwindled and mum had to confess they'd separated.

How can a housewife justify multiple affairs?

~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, March 5, 2017.

I'VE often wondered what life would be like if it is devoid of the heady sensation of sex? A lot had been said and written on how revered it should be in marriage. Yet, on the other side of the coin, illicit sex is so available you could virtually have it on tap! When you mention kiss and tell, an image of a man pops up. I mean, what married woman in her senses would confess to an affair even with a gun held to her head, let alone brag about the joy of illicit sex? Times are really changing.

The smug smiles a couple of my friends and I wear when we discussed our 'indiscretions' pale into insignificance when compared with what the average adventurous wife gets away with these days. And she's so brazen she often brags about how easy it is to pull the wool over hubby's eyes.

Vivienne, a much younger friend is one of these high-flying professionals with the Midas touch. She currently works with a boss who was recruited from abroad by the firm they both work with. Viv's been bending my ears on how handsome and cosmopolitan Greg, the boss was that on this day I called on her, I automatically switched off when she started singing Greg's praise. I'd reminded her often she'd just been married less than 10 years and affairs should be off her menu. "I love Ebere (the husband) but he could be so predictable at times." She would tell me in her defence. This day in question, she was babbling on about Greg when I took notice of what she had to say. "I often have erotic dreams about him and now we've been teamed to work overtime on our new account, heavens only know what would happen", she said excitedly.

"What do you mean?", I asked in my don't-do-any-thing-foolish voice. "I've been having these erotic dreams about him and now we'll be working together often, anything could happen". I warned her of the consequences of any rash action, then left. But I couldn't get her out of my mind. I was so curious I had to pay her another visit some few months later. "Oh aunty- C, I feel guilty I couldn't give you a call or visit, I've been so busy!' she said. 'I can imagine,' I mumbled under my breath. It is always a delight to visit her anyway as she entertains lavishly whenever I called. With fresh fish stew and boiled potatoes in my belly, being washed down with a very good wine, Viv dropped her bombshell: "I've relived my dream", she declared. I almost choked on the wine as my ears perked up. "Some weeks back, after we'd finished one of our projects, Greg sent for food from the nearest hotel and popped a bottle of champagne he'd put in his fridge. Before the food arrived, we'd almost finished the bottle which explained why I became giggly and hot when Greg started teasing.


I told him about my dreams and he leered. 'Now's the time to find out,' he said as he moved closer – in a few seconds, we were in a clinch, kissing furiously and helping each other out of our clothes. In no time at all, we were on his office couch, making frantic, raunchy love – the thought of my marriage flying out of the window. "I couldn't have stopped him even if I wanted to! When it was over, he looked really proud of his achievement but I didn't mind. It was the best bunk I'd had for months'.

YOUR EX IS NOT YOUR FRIEND

Written by Utchay Lugar 
~Panyan, Upper West, GhanaGhana.

Are you a friend to your Ex? do you talk often? Are you always chatting, Meeting up, etc? If the answer is yes to any of these questions then the man or woman you call Ex is not.

You can't be friends with your Ex, and this particular topic is causing a lot of mayhem in many relationships; one spouse is comfortable talking to the ex, while the other wonders ‘what at all do they talk about’? Why did they let that relationship go? Their response is, ‘I can't hate my Ex, he or she is just a friend’.

Love usually starts from being strangers, to friends, then lovers. Anytime the love is over, you get back to your default status which is strangers who are familiar; not enemies and it doesn’t mean you hate your Ex.

Familiar in the sense of what we once had or shared, but the relationship, feelings and what we once shared is dead. What is left in the archives is history. Because we are no longer together, there is nothing to talk about or celebrate for we have learnt our lessons and moved on.

No matter how good a medicine or drug is it can only work best before death, but after death nothing can be cured. It is same with relationships. Love is possible after friendship but friendship is not possible after love.
The only time friendship is possible after love is when love is still present and not gone at all. The only time medicine can cure is when death has not occurred; if the medicine still works then one is not dead yet or just pretending to be dead.

She blames her mum's alcoholism for their dad's death!

Written by Bunmi Sofola
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, February 19, 2017.

ALCOHOLICS have always been accused of making the lives of their loved ones miserable whenever the dreaded alcohol takes over their personality. And this happens as often as they get drunk. When Tomi's father died a couple of years ago, she was heartbroken and bitter that their mother's hostility towards him, especially when he was ill, coupled with her unreasonable grumpiness to the children hastened their father's departure to the grave.

"Our dad was diagnosed with cancer over three years ago. He needed extra care at home and I rescheduled my work at the school I ran so, I could be with him more often. Dad welcomed the change, but mum didn't," Tomi, a 42-year -old mother of three said. "Even before our dad became ill, I had a difficult relationship with our mum. In our teens, my sisters and I would cringe as we listened to her pick fights with dad. She was clingy, jealous and self-absorbed. I had to endure hours of her complaining about him when I got home from school – details too intimate for a daughter to hear about her parents' relationship. My sisters used to disappear but as the eldest, I had to endure it. At some point, I felt brave enough to tell her she wasn't being fair, that he was my dad and I loved him. Her focus has always been inwards, which means she barely asks about my life. Dad, on the other hand, was immensely proud of me and we could talk for hours – this made her more resentful.

"When I spent those last few months with him, I tried hard to talk about anything but his illness. Meanwhile, mum became a martyr to his care, complaining how exhausted she was, while pushing away offers of help. I tried to anticipate what I could do to relieve her burden, yet knew this irritated her. It came to a head one evening when she asked me directly if I got homesick. I replied that my husband was fully in charge of the kids and understood why I had to be with my father in his dying moments. She kept on at me until dad asked her to shut up. Next morning, she told me point blank she wanted time alone with him and that I was welcome to visit at the weekends.

"After dad's death, my sisters and I (and dad's siblings and friends) were relegated to small parts in a play that put our mum's grief at centre stage. This all with the embarrassment of her drinking to excess. She has no sense of self-awareness, so never thinks to curtail her drinking to save her children from public embarrassment. My recent birthday was dominated by keeping her from harm and putting her to bed, stark drunk. I tend not to hold grudges, but with mum I can't slake off something close to hate – since I spent more time crying over the way she treated me than I did for my dying father.


"She offers comments that our (me and my sisters') loss isn't as crippling as hers and this makes me angry. How do I get to be a good daughter when I have to brace myself to call her and don't want to visit her on my own? Our dad's death has proved he was the glue between mum and the children, and now there's nothing."

Sex surrogates: Your man's impotence has a solution!

Written by Bunmi Sofola
~Vanguard Nigeria. Friday, February 17, 2017.

AS I bent over Ken, a truncheon in my hand, he looked up at me with a strange sort of longing in his eyes. I kissed him hard on the lips and moved my mouth over his neck and chest. I let him get a good look at me in my American cop uniform before I took off my top and threw it on the floor. I stepped out of my knickers and straddled

him on the bed, kissing him again and stroking his body. And then it happened. I saw him get aroused as I watched. 'Bingo,' I thought, and slipping on protection, he maintained his erection as we had sex. You see George has an intimacy problem. He's in a long-term relationship and madly in love with his girlfriend but he struggles to get an erection during sex. My job is to help him-and other men like him-find their confidence sexually…."

Ashley Grayson is one of a growing number of sexual surrogates all over the world. She is married and what she does is far from prostitution. She continues:"I'm not a prostitute, although I have been called one by people ignorant of my profession. I'm a sex surrogate. I help men with sexual or intimacy problems. I step in for their partner when there's a problem and I coach them through it. I also work with single men who

have sexual anxieties and need help to overcome them. I'm in partnership with a qualified sexual psychologist who holds therapy sessions with clients. There, she will talk to them about their most intimate thoughts, experiences and issues and draw out their insecurities and anxieties. We then work together to devise a 'sexual programme' to help the client overcome his problems.

"And that's where I come in. I work one-on-one with the men over several sessions, sometimes as many as a dozen. We start off very slowly and I usually start by working on eye contact and holding hands. My job is to help the man overcome his problems with intimacy. So he can go back to his partner a confident sexual being. Or, if he's single, he can initiate a sexual relationship and follow through with it, without crippling fear or insecurities stopping him. Sexual therapy of this kind enables the client to discover intimacy as a healing experience, free from the pressures, potential rejection and judgemental attitudes they have experienced in their sexual conditioning.

How to successfully tame your hostile mother-in-law!

By Okogba
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, February 19, 2017.

DUNNI has been a sort of little brother for years now, and he freely comes to me any time he wants any advice. Not that much was happening in his life, not for a long time at least. An only child, he schooled in Britain and only came home when his mum had a mild stroke and could no longer run the family furniture business. His dad had passed on long before then and he confessed he couldn’t cope. “I’m not the businessman type”, he moaned "the first time he discussed the family business with me. ”I’ve noticed how firmly mum deals with the workers but I don’t really have the bottle. For a start, I know little or nothing about the staff, and for another I can’t really shout when things go wrong. I’m not the aggressive type".

I told him to keep his ears to the ground, look for one or two allies amongst the staff and tap their brain. It seemed to work for a while until one of the ‘allies’ started giving him the eye. Handsome is hardly a word to described Dunni, but he is intelligent and kind. In his early thirties, he could count the number of girlfriends he’s had on the finger. His idea of a wild night was having a good meal at a decent restaurant and topping that up with choice wine. So when he started going out with Fareedah, his mum’s personal assistant, I was happy for him.

When he brought her to the house however, my enthusiasm dipped. The girl was very pretty and extremely extroverted. She was considerably younger. What would she want with drab Dunni when she could have her pick of men? But then, I chided myself, she could have had her heart broken by a few Casanovas and wanted to give Mr. Nice Man a chance.

Dunni admitted he was a bit wary of falling in love with her when we next met. “But she is very "caring, Auntie,” he said. “You know I didn’t have that much experience with dating women, but she’d since taken care of that. The shyness I usually felt when I was near women disappeared when I went out with her the first time and she kissed me, I could hardly contain myself. As a result, our first experience at lovemaking was almost disastrous; I had no confidence because it had been such a long time I was with a woman that it was over almost before it started. But she was patient with me and the next time was better. Now we have the sort of sex I’d only ever dreamt of … ”

When I asked if he’d met any of her friends and family he told me her parents were dead. “I’ve met her friends and they are really nice,” he assured me. “If they thought it was odd her going out with me when she was so pretty and younger, they didn’t show it. Anyway, I’ve changed so much since I met her. She’s overhauled my wardrobe and made me buy a sexier car.

It's none of his business the number of partners you've 'had'!

Candida by Okogba
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, February 12, 2017.

A young friend of mine recently met the man of her dreams. In the whirlwind courtship that followed, they quickly got round to the conversational games that lovers play. And so it was that Mr. Right asked Miss Right; "How many men have you slept with? The sensible girl immediately reversed the question, to which 'he answered '13'. She then replied with a circumspect '10'.

"How many is it really?" I asked excitedly. `Somewhere between a hundred and a hundred and ten', she said, not batting.an eye lid. "So why did she say 10?" ` I just thought that whatever he said, mine should be less'. How brutally honest can you get? 100 to 110 guys in how many years?!

This little story got me thinking what most latter day emotional, Shylock Holmes, think they are letting themselves in for when they seem bent on digging into past histories of their new lovers! It is a really funny question when you are faced with that kind of a quandary.

"As a regular rule," continued our woman-of-the world, "a woman would do well to gauge her answer from a man's. But what happens if he says 400? Would a response of 308 show a charmingly coy sexual reticence or elicit an indignant 'you're not the mother of my future children" from her shocked partner?

"One thing you should avoid saying is that you can't remember because that could reflect badly on you. I can't remember? That many, is it? She continues: "As a rule, men, automatically double the real figure and women automatically half it. Factual information backs up the theory. There are lies, damn lies and statistics and then there are sexual statistics which must be special kind of double lie. 'Whatever lies you tell, you need to get your head above the proverbial troubled waters!

"How many people you sleep with is a private matter. How many people you admit to having slept with is a social matter and, therefore, a question of manners. What you tell your friend is different from what you tell your lovers. People want to feel special, not as though they are part of a sprawling number game. A white lie isn't necessarily a wicked deceit, but could be simple courtesy. Why tread on someone's dreams when you can just as easily not?"

Good common sense, that is, if you ask me. Only it is amazing, how many good relationships are put in jeopardy in the male partners' quest to find out how promiscuous their female partners are. Are they as promiscuous as 'friends' say they are? At one of our 'old-students' renewals recently, we reverted to nostalgia, asking about old boyfriends. One of us looked particularly – sad and it expired that after her studies, she became pregnant and planned excitedly for a wedding with the love of her life. She was more than bewildered when the boy practically disappeared from the face of the earth.

Do you honestly believe your wife could do without sex?!

Written by Candida
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, January 29, 2017.

REASONS people give for committing adultery gets more and more atrocious by the day. Gbemi had been married to Yori for four years after a courtship that lasted almost six years. Only, in the last few years, their relationship had disintegrated and when their son was born two years ago, the love-making stopped. According to Gbemi: "Sometimes I felt more like the nanny for his son than a wife. I did most of the chores helped by an inexperienced house- help, on top of which I had a full-time job. But I got no appreciation or affection in return.

"I'd tried everything I could think of to try to fix things. I'd dressed in sexy lingerie to try and seduce him. I'd even tried blatantly asking to have sex. But Yori was having none of it, always brushing me off with excuses. After which he started coming to bed hours after me. It had been two years since we last made love and I was at my wits' end. Our sex life had always been important to me. In my view it really helps a couple bond. Without it, you're just two people living together. In the end, I sat him down and demanded we talk about it. I told him: 'We need to deal with this because no matter what you think, this is destroying our relationship.'

"He looked uncomfortable and embarrassed. 'I just don't feel like having sex any more. I'm sorry, but the desire has gone.' He said, a bit sad. It was a blow – but what he said next shocked me to the core. 'If you want it so badly, why don't you try someone else?" I told him I wanted to save our marriage, not leave it. 'That's not what I mean,' he said, 'you could have an affair. I wouldn't mind. People do it all the time.' This was not the way I expected the conversation to go. I wanted him to agree to try harder, not suggest I try with someone else. 'I want you,' I shouted at him. 'I want to have sex with you, not with anyone else. I want my marriage to work! But he's come up with 'his' solution and wasn't budging.


"He repeated the offer over a few months. I guess he knew I wouldn't do it. He was just saying it to shut me up. We were at this impasse, stuck in a sexless marriage when I ran into Francis, an old flame. We had gone out while we were at the university and he told me he was recently divorced. He was still handsome, still his jovial self. Even though I hadn't seen him for over 15 years we got on well and I was still attracted to him. He jokingly said he wouldn't mind taking me to bed for old time's sake and I said 'why not'.

Here's what happens when you stop having sex

~The Punch Nigeria. Tuesday, January 24, 2017. 

While the average healthy adult loves to have sex, a lot of things also sometimes make us go on sex sabbatical, such that in some relationships, partners relegate that aspect of their union to the background!

Yet, Marvin Gaye knew what he was saying when he sang about sexual healing!

Physicians warn that staying off sex for an extended period can have negative impact on your overall wellbeing, such as these ones...

Heightened risks of erectile dysfunction: Naturally, as men advance in age, rock-hard erections are no longer guaranteed; but when you now have to go on long time without sex, your risk for erectile dysfunction doubles, compared to men who have sex at least once a week. A study published in the American Journal of Medicine suggests that, since the penis is a muscle, frequent sex may help preserve your potency, just as physical exercise helps maintain strength. So, to guard against erectile dysfunction, have sex regularly - even if it's once a week.

Depression: Women can get mood-lifting incentives through sex! A study published in the Archives of Sexual Behaviour says some compounds found in semen - such as melatonin, serotonin, and oxytocin - may have mood-boosting benefits for women who have unprotected intercourse. Warning: Ensure that your partner has no sexually transmitted infections!

You can have bouts of cold/flu: Sexually intercourse arms you with the body's first line of defence against viruses - immunoglobulin A (IgA). According to scientists at the Wilkes-Barre University in Pennsylvania, USA, people who have sex once or twice a week enjoy a 30 per cent boost in immunoglobulin A (IgA), compared with those who have sex seldom or never.

Risk of prostate cancer: A study presented to the American Urological Association states that men who have sex regularly have a 20 per cent drop in their risk for prostate cancer. They say this is because frequent ejaculations may remove potentially harmful substances from the prostate.

Anxiety heightens: Scottish researchers say people who don't have sex regularly may be unable to cope with stressful situations, compared with those who have sex at least once a week. The scientists note that during sexual intercourse, the brain releases feel-good chemicals such as endorphins and oxytocin, which help people feel more at ease.

The bottom line: Enjoy sex with the one you love. The benefits are many.

When a man cheats on his wife!

Written by Yetunde Arebi
~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, January 15, 2017.

Please, close your eyes for a minute. Now, imagine that something terrible just happened to you, such as an accident or illness, rendering you incapable of being in charge of your life. You have become so incapacitated, you can no longer run your own show. You can no longer bark out orders at your family and loved ones.

You are no longer that fire spitting boss at the office that everyone dreaded to cross path with. No longer are you that loud laughing, back pumping buddy to your friends and colleagues. Your beer guzzling and cigarette puffing addiction which you loved to call enjoyment can no longer be fed. Yes, imagine that you are now totally dependent on some other persons to help you get by.

You need someone to take care of your personal private needs, particularly toilet needs. Simple tasks such as bathing, brushing your teeth, eating, sitting, getting into your own bed, talking, laughing, and even taking your own medication have become the duty of some others. All you can do now is stare at the ceiling and into space as you lay in your bed like a zombie. What do you think would happen to you should you suddenly become a vegetable? Who do you think ought to be responsible for your care?

This was exactly what happened to Steve, a 59 year old business man when he suddenly suffered a severe stroke two years ago. According to Angelica, his wife of about 25 years, it all happened so suddenly late one night." Because we did not share a room, I did not realise that anything had happened to him until I woke up at about 5.30am to use the bathroom and heard a muffled sound coming from his room.

It was a strange sound, so I decided to check on him. Then, I saw him, lay out straight and staring at the ceiling, foaming from his mouth. I rushed out of our apartment and alerted the neighbours to help us get him to the hospital and called his siblings and some close family members too. Informing them of the development.

This was very important so no one would accuse me of keeping his condition a secret from them until something irreversible happened. As you are aware, a woman is usually held responsible for any condition or death of her husband in this part of the world, even if the cause of his death is public knowledge.

At the hospital, we were informed that he had suffered a full stroke which had affected his brain severely. He lost virtually all his senses, movement, coordination, speech, feeling (touch), he just lay there, with his eyes open without seeing anything or acknowledging anything. The family coughed out a fortune to save his life and God granted him favour. He survived but became a vegetable. The man I once knew is gone and may never return to that body".

Why it pays to have hubby's mistress on your side!

Written by Bunmi Sofola
~vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, January 8, 2017.

WHILE some wives hang on to a marriage despite abuse bothering on 'intimate terrorism', quite a few who value their pride draw the line on how much they can take from a marriage before packing their bags – children and all. "One rainy day seven years ago,I recalled Freida, a hugely successful business woman, "an amateur detective mission I'd set myself came to fruition. I had amassed the clues and every- shred of evidence. I was closing in on the slut who was sleeping with my husband.

"My heart was virtually in my throat as the moment approached when I would finally confront her. The other woman. The mistress. My husband's bit on the side. Whatever name I chose to call her, she amounted to the same thing. She was the woman with whom my husband, Deji, was conducting an affair. The woman for whom he was willing to sacrifice our almost ten years of marriage and a happy home we'd built for our three children. And there she was, walking the length and breath of this fairly posh hotel as a supervisor. A staff member had discreetly pointed her to me and I walked up to her. 'Are you Linda?' I asked this slim tall woman with badly done hair extensions. I was really surprised at what I saw.

She was slim, tall and at least nine years younger than me. Her look of blank perflexing turned to shock when I told her, "I'm Freida, your lover's wife.' She looked really lost for words as she scanned the faces of other hotel guests.

"Until I came face to face with Linda, I'd envisaged Deji's mistress as a younger and more successful version of me. Yet here she was in bend-down jeans, a fake designer handbag and a cheap vest top. I felt relieved but also perplexed, that she wasn't what I call his type. She was several inches taller than him for a start. I simply couldn't picture them together.

She was dumb-struck. She meekly followed me to a cheaper eatery near the hotel after her manager agreed she could come with me for half an hour.

Sexual issues and solutions true facts about the penis

Written by Kemi Fawole (MD)

Phone: 08034666358, 07059294782 

Email: vieweden@yahoo.com, viewden@ymail.com

Web: www.viewden.com. 

~Vanguard Nigeria. Wednesday, December 7, 2016.

We can go on and on about some facts you need to know about the penis, but we just have to hold on to the basic ones which includes -

A penis is not under conscious control. It's under the control of a guy's autonomic nervous system.

Smoking can shrink your penis by as much as a centimeter during the course of your life - and will make it much less likely you can get an erection.

The underside of the penis head is the most sensitive spot. These means its important that everyman out there lives a healthy lifestyle and eat well.

I'm a 58 year old man with serious condition of diabetes & hypertension which I have been treating for some years now and this has led to total loss of erection. My wife performs all the sexual exercises & this really makes me feel bad. I have started Using Vitolize and I noticed after the second week that I can now get erection though not as hard as I'd wanted but I'm so glad I could come up. Can I combine Vitolize with either African superman or Man up pills for stronger erection on demand? Or what do you suggest - Hon Justice Chriss

Hello Honorable, I'm so glad to hear that you could get an erection with Vitolize, cos in most cases of near impotence, treatment takes longer than that, some are on erection supplements for as long as three months before they can come up with any erection, But Vitolize awakens the redundant tissues due to the suppressant drugs for your diabetes and hypertension, causing rush of blood to the penile tissue slowly. Yes you can take either Man-up pills, or African Superman which increases stamina, sexdrive and the time of intercourse and take effect within thirty minutes of usage and compliments the work of Vitolize and are herbal and very safe just like Vitolize which is a sexual performance enhancer for men. You can take either Man up,, African superman or rhino 5 with the Vitolize. And in case you don't want something in pill form, you can take Maxman coffee to increase stamina, libido and for strong erection.

Im 35 years and I have a serious case of premature ejaculation, what do you think can help me cos the situation is so frustrating. I have been to your website and seen a lot of very lovely products, but it's so difficult to choose.- Chimezie

Chimezie, like I normally tell people, premature ejaculation is more of psychological than medical in about 90% of men and this caused by stress, unbalanced diet, smoking, alcohol etc. to make you last long for about 25 to 30 minutes on your woman, you can get Vitolize or Vigrx plus helps to correct it , but it takes about two to three months to totally correct

Africa’s longest-serving leaders

~Vanguard Nigeria. Friday, December 2, 2016.

Jose Eduardo

Angolan President Jose Eduardo dos Santos, who is set to stand down next year after 38 years in power, is one of Africa’s longest-serving leaders.

The continent is home to many men who have held office for two decades or more, and dos Santos is currently second overall, just a month behind Teodoro Obiang Nguema of Equatorial Guinea.

Here is a rundown:

– African leaders for more than 30 years –

– In tiny, oil-rich Equatorial Guinea, President Obiang is Africa’s longest-serving leader, at 37 years.

Obiang came to power in a coup on August 3, 1979, ousting his own uncle, Francisco Macias Nguema, who was shot by a firing squad.

– Dos Santos is next in Angola, having taken up his post on September 21, 1979.

– Robert Mugabe, 92, rounds out the podium at number three, having run Zimbabwe since its independence in April 1980.

Mugabe is the only leader to have ruled since independence, and has now been either prime minister or president (since 1987) for more than 36 years.

– In Cameroon, Paul Biya has 34 years under his belt. He became president on November 6, 1982 after serving seven years as prime minister.

– Congolese President Denis Sassou Nguesso has spent 32 years in office, but not in one go. He first served from 1979 to 1992 and then came back to run the country in 1997 at the end of a civil war.

Sassou Nguesso was re-elected in March 2016 and could run again when the current term expires.


– In Uganda, Yoweri Museveni has been in power for more than 30 years. He took office in January 1986 after winning the war that ousted Idi Amin Dada, with help from neighbouring Tanzania.

He was elected to a fifth term in February 2016 amid allegations of fraud.

– King Mswati III of Swaziland is Africa’s last absolute monarch. He acceded to the throne of the tiny southern kingdom in April 1986.

– In power for more than 20 years –

– In Sudan, Omar al-Bashir has ruled for 27 years since he staged a successful coup in June 1989.

– Chad’s leader Idriss Deby took over the north-central African nation in December 1990, giving him 26 years in power. Deby won a disputed fifth term in April 2016.

– Eritrea’s head of state Issayas Afewerki has been around since 1993.

– Gambian leader Yahya Jammeh has ruled for 22 years since he staged a coup in July 1994. However, he was defeated by opposition leader Adama Barrow, failing to get a fifth five-year term in Thursday’s election.

Pornography: Pornography can ruin your marriage

Topics:
Pornography can ruin your marriage
Dealing with the scourge of pornography
_______________________________

Pornography can ruin your marriage

Written by Tunde Ajaja

~Punch Nigeria. Sunday, September 18, 2016.

Pornography, being the visual material containing the explicit description or display of sexual organs or activity, intended to stimulate sexual excitement, is no doubt one sexual activity that has been in existence for a long time. For some, it is something they watch in their leisure, and for some others, it has become an addiction.

As much as it has been condemned by moralists and spiritual leaders, more so that major religions also abhor it, it is however interesting to note that it keeps spreading, and more than ever before, people across all ages; young, old and elderly seem to (increasingly) indulge in it.

According to Covenant Eyes, internet accountability and filtering company, as of 2007, global porn revenues were estimated at $20bn.

A report had shown that the number of pornographic views on one of the popular pornographic websites rose from 63.2 billion video views in 2012 to 78.9 billion views in 2013, and phones accounted for 45 per cent of these views; desktop was 44 per cent and views on tablets rose by 20 per cent to account for its 11 per cent.

Previous reports had also found that men are 543 per cent more likely to watch pornography than females, but one in three women also watches it at least once a week, and most of such persons view it on their mobile devices.

It is believed that most people who watch pornography do so to satisfy their sexual urge, but it is worthy of note that some married persons also watch it.

For married persons who watch it, such is seen as a symbol of sexual dissatisfaction and or matrimonial discontentment, especially if the viewer started it after entering into marriage.

Findings have revealed that watching pornography has numerous side effects, as it can dull the brain, breed masturbation, influence the viewer's perception of the opposite sex as a mere sex object, breed inferiority complex and reduce libido. But beyond these, it has been found to be one of the things that ruin marriages.

Babies may be made without women

~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, September 18, 2016.

Experiments by Bath University researchers hint at a future in which children are born from embryos made from skin cells rather than eggs.

The embryos could even be nurtured outside the body in artificial wombs, making women redundant from the creation of life. The hi-tech IVF treatment would allow two men to have a baby that is genetically their own. It could also allow a man to have his own child - without any input from another man or woman.


A technique that allowed babies to be created without eggs would also be seized on by older women desperate to become mothers, and by girls whose fertility has been damaged by treatment for cancer. Researcher Tony Perry stressed that such scenarios were 'entirely speculative and fanciful'. But publicising his work in the Nature Communications journal, he added: 'If it is ever possible, one day in the distant future people will look back and say this is where it started.'

His excitement centres on experiments which showed it is possible to fuse sperm with something other than Experiments by Bath University researchers hint at a future in which children are born from embryos made from skin cells rather than eggs. an egg and produce a litter of healthy mice. Starting with eggs, Dr Perry used chemicals to trick them into beginning to turn into embryos. These would normally die, but when Dr Perry injected them with mouse sperm, many lived and went on to form healthy baby mice. Some of those mice even went on to have pups of their own.

Bearded woman makes it into Guinness Book of World Records

~Nigerian Tribune. Friday, September 9, 2016.

A beautiful bearded woman, Harnaam Kaur, stunned a global audience when when she was announced as world most bearded woman, thereby making in into the book of Guinness World Records for 2017.

Kaur, who is a body-image activist and runway model reacting to her award said: “I am super proud to hold this record, the inner child in me is so pleased. I grew up reading this book, I even tried breaking some of my own records wanting to be in this book,” Kaur, 24, wrote on Instagram Thursday. Rather than remove her facial hair — the result of a hormonal condition called polycystic ovarian syndrome, for which September happens to be awareness month — the British challenger of beauty norms has chosen to nurture her whiskers.

“It is amazing to be valued and celebrated being a Bearded Lady. I am proud to hold this amazing record,” she continued. “I hope those who read or see my record can take away positivity, inspiration and realise that no matter who you are or what you look like, you are officially amazing!”

Bearded-woman-site2

Yahoo News had reported that Kaur joins other beauty-themed record breakers this year, including Tyler Wright, who has what’s been deemed to be the largest afro (10 inches high and 9 inches wide); a group of 261 people in Milan who were recognized for the category Most People Wearing Their Hair in a Beehive; and Charlotte Guttenberg, 67, and her partner, Charles “Chuck” Helmke, both of Florida, for Most Tattooed Senior Citizens. Their bodies are covered with tats 91.5 percent and 93.75 percent, respectively.

Guinness has named Kaur the youngest female with a full beard. She began growing facial hair at age 11, and spent much of her adolescence dealing with shame, bullies, and efforts at hair removal. But at age 16, she made the decision to accept all of herself and embrace her beard.

Kaur’s confidence paid off, as last year she became the first woman to walk a major runway with a full beard, working the catwalk for jewelry designer Marianna Harutunian as part of Royal Fashion Day. Previously, she signed on to be a rep for model Tess Holliday’s social media campaign #EffYourBeautyStandards, spreading the love-yourself message to all.

The activist’s induction to Guinness has delighted Kaur’s many supporters. “I love that there was a record to break!” wrote one of her more than 61,000 Instagram followers. “Not because others have gone through the pain you have, but because it’s amazing to see ‘different’ celebrated and honoured. Congratulations!”